Story: "Birthday Girl" (Part 4 of 18)
Apr. 26th, 2013 12:14 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
ysabetwordsmithThis story is a sequel to "Love Is for Children," "Eggshells," "Dolls and Guys," "Turnabout Is Fair Play," and "Touching Moments," "Splash," and "Coming Around."
Fandom: The Avengers
Characters: Phil Coulson, Clint Barton, Natasha Romanova, Tony Stark, Bruce Banner, Hulk, Steve Rogers, Betty Ross, JARVIS.
Medium: Fiction
Warnings: Inferences of past child abuse. Current environment is safe.
Summary: Doombots crash a beautiful spring day in the park. The Avengers clean up the mess. This includes Natasha's rather confused longing for something she never had: a birthday party.
Notes: Asexual character (Clint). Aromantic character (Natasha). Asexual relationship. Teamwork. Canon-typical violence. Friendship. Confusion. Hulk is a genius too. Fluff. Making up for lost time. Birthday. Cultural traditions. Games. Gifts. Cake. The cake is never a lie! Tickling. Trust issues. Safety and security. Non-sexual touching and intimacy. Personal growth. Family of choice.
Begin with Part 1, Part 2, Part 3. Skip to Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part 9, Part 10, Part 11, Part 12, Part 13, Part 14, Part 15, Part 16, Part 17. Part 18.
"Birthday Girl" Part 4
Phil hovered over his battle-weary team as soon as he got them home. Steve was mobile but sore all over, balanced carefully between Tony and Clint. Wanting a distraction and some company, Steve refused to go to bed. Phil agreed since Steve wasn't in any danger, just uncomfortable. Clint helped Steve settle on the common room couch supported by pillows, and Tony put Ratatouille on the viewscreen.
Bruce was likewise mobile, as long as Phil and Natasha kept him upright, but he was nowhere near functional. Bruce didn't want to leave Steve, so they let him curl up on the loveseat with another pile of pillows. The other Avengers flopped into chairs around them, not really wanting to be separated either. Phil set a crockpot of chili to heat and went back to the common room.
Bruce clutched the purple balloon and asked Phil, "Why did Clint give me this?"
"It's a souvenir," Phil said. "It goes with this." He handed Bruce a Starkpad queued to the relevant footage.
Bruce watched the video of Hulk and Clint playing catch. "This is the same balloon?" he asked, looking up at Phil.
"Yep, same one," Clint answered. "Hulk likes 'bloons' a lot."
"It really is," Phil said. He rested a reassuring hand on Bruce's shoulder.
"The Other Guy didn't pop it," Bruce said slowly, rubbing his fingertips over the delicate sphere. He ran the video again. "Why are they so far apart? Hawkeye is standing outside Hulk's reach. I thought they liked each other? They were cuddling in the pictures you've showed me before ..."
Bruce misses sock-Clint, Phil suspected. He reached over and brought up a few still images, including the one of Hawkeye hugging Hulk while Hulk tried to hand the mylar balloon to Black Widow. "They got in their hugs later," Phil said.
"Playing with the balloons was Hulk's idea. He wanted to show you that he can be gentle," Clint explained to Bruce. "Playing catch was my idea. I thought it might not bother you as much if I stood back."
Bruce tugged off his glasses and rubbed his eyes. "That, um ... this is ..."
"Hey, are you okay?" Clint scrambled out of his chair to crouch beside Bruce and clasp his knee in an offer of support.
"No, not really," Bruce said, his voice shaking. Under Phil's hand, his shoulder trembled too. "You just ... kind of disproved what I thought was a robust theory. I'm not ... I can't ... this isn't something I can ignore anymore. Balloons are fragile. If the Other Guy can do that, handle them safely ... then it's real, it has to be, and ..." Bruce hiccupped to a stop. He took a deep breath. "I can't do this right now. I'm too tired. I'll, I'll think about it later." He handed the Starkpad to Phil. He didn't let go of the balloon, though. "Can I just watch the movie?"
* * *
Notes:
Ratatouille is a whimsical movie about a rat who wants to be a chef.
Gentleness is an expression of strength bounded by control and compassion. It's not necessary to be gentle with unbreakable things, but rather with fragile things. The greater one's strength, the greater the need to be gentle because more things are breakable in comparison. There are ways to cultivate gentleness and compassion. Here are more exercises in gentleness.
Cognitive dissonance happens when two contradictory ideas occupy the same mental space. For example, "Hulk is a monster incapable of being gentle" and "Here is Hulk holding a balloon without popping it." People tend to hate cognitive dissonance. A common way to resolve it is by lying to oneself. There are other, more positive solutions too. Cognitive dissonance can also be applied for personal growth.
Now here's where we start to see the cool things about Bruce. He is stubborn, but not stupid. He is a scientist, and he's deeply invested in that identity. So that shapes how he deals with the Other Guy. First we have the idea of falsifiability: a legitimately framed hypothesis is one that could be disproven. A piece of evidence that disproves a hypothesis is often called a white crow, although the falsifiability source article is using black swans instead, and Bruce has a purple balloon. Confirmation bias inclines people to seek only information that agrees with their established stance; good scientists strive to avoid that bad habit. A theory is based on a hypothesis that not only plays out consistently in repeated experiments, but has an accurate predictive factor. A robust theory is one that has survived multiple efforts to alter or disprove it, accounts for all observed phenomena under a wide range of varying conditions, and remains the best explanation of the data. Bruce's observations were "Hulk isn't gentle" (description of previous activity) and "When Hulk appears, things and people WILL get smashed" (prediction). With a person, Hulk might not decide to smash at a given moment but could the next; people are vulnerable but not so fragile. But now Bruce has one example that absolutely cannot fit that: the purple balloon, unpopped, disproves the theory of Hulk as an uncontrollable ragemonster. And when push comes to shove, Bruce's identity "I am a scientist practicing legitimate scientific method" outweighs "Hulk isn't gentle."
[To be continued in Part 5 ...]
Fandom: The Avengers
Characters: Phil Coulson, Clint Barton, Natasha Romanova, Tony Stark, Bruce Banner, Hulk, Steve Rogers, Betty Ross, JARVIS.
Medium: Fiction
Warnings: Inferences of past child abuse. Current environment is safe.
Summary: Doombots crash a beautiful spring day in the park. The Avengers clean up the mess. This includes Natasha's rather confused longing for something she never had: a birthday party.
Notes: Asexual character (Clint). Aromantic character (Natasha). Asexual relationship. Teamwork. Canon-typical violence. Friendship. Confusion. Hulk is a genius too. Fluff. Making up for lost time. Birthday. Cultural traditions. Games. Gifts. Cake. The cake is never a lie! Tickling. Trust issues. Safety and security. Non-sexual touching and intimacy. Personal growth. Family of choice.
Begin with Part 1, Part 2, Part 3. Skip to Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part 9, Part 10, Part 11, Part 12, Part 13, Part 14, Part 15, Part 16, Part 17. Part 18.
"Birthday Girl" Part 4
Phil hovered over his battle-weary team as soon as he got them home. Steve was mobile but sore all over, balanced carefully between Tony and Clint. Wanting a distraction and some company, Steve refused to go to bed. Phil agreed since Steve wasn't in any danger, just uncomfortable. Clint helped Steve settle on the common room couch supported by pillows, and Tony put Ratatouille on the viewscreen.
Bruce was likewise mobile, as long as Phil and Natasha kept him upright, but he was nowhere near functional. Bruce didn't want to leave Steve, so they let him curl up on the loveseat with another pile of pillows. The other Avengers flopped into chairs around them, not really wanting to be separated either. Phil set a crockpot of chili to heat and went back to the common room.
Bruce clutched the purple balloon and asked Phil, "Why did Clint give me this?"
"It's a souvenir," Phil said. "It goes with this." He handed Bruce a Starkpad queued to the relevant footage.
Bruce watched the video of Hulk and Clint playing catch. "This is the same balloon?" he asked, looking up at Phil.
"Yep, same one," Clint answered. "Hulk likes 'bloons' a lot."
"It really is," Phil said. He rested a reassuring hand on Bruce's shoulder.
"The Other Guy didn't pop it," Bruce said slowly, rubbing his fingertips over the delicate sphere. He ran the video again. "Why are they so far apart? Hawkeye is standing outside Hulk's reach. I thought they liked each other? They were cuddling in the pictures you've showed me before ..."
Bruce misses sock-Clint, Phil suspected. He reached over and brought up a few still images, including the one of Hawkeye hugging Hulk while Hulk tried to hand the mylar balloon to Black Widow. "They got in their hugs later," Phil said.
"Playing with the balloons was Hulk's idea. He wanted to show you that he can be gentle," Clint explained to Bruce. "Playing catch was my idea. I thought it might not bother you as much if I stood back."
Bruce tugged off his glasses and rubbed his eyes. "That, um ... this is ..."
"Hey, are you okay?" Clint scrambled out of his chair to crouch beside Bruce and clasp his knee in an offer of support.
"No, not really," Bruce said, his voice shaking. Under Phil's hand, his shoulder trembled too. "You just ... kind of disproved what I thought was a robust theory. I'm not ... I can't ... this isn't something I can ignore anymore. Balloons are fragile. If the Other Guy can do that, handle them safely ... then it's real, it has to be, and ..." Bruce hiccupped to a stop. He took a deep breath. "I can't do this right now. I'm too tired. I'll, I'll think about it later." He handed the Starkpad to Phil. He didn't let go of the balloon, though. "Can I just watch the movie?"
* * *
Notes:
Ratatouille is a whimsical movie about a rat who wants to be a chef.
Gentleness is an expression of strength bounded by control and compassion. It's not necessary to be gentle with unbreakable things, but rather with fragile things. The greater one's strength, the greater the need to be gentle because more things are breakable in comparison. There are ways to cultivate gentleness and compassion. Here are more exercises in gentleness.
Cognitive dissonance happens when two contradictory ideas occupy the same mental space. For example, "Hulk is a monster incapable of being gentle" and "Here is Hulk holding a balloon without popping it." People tend to hate cognitive dissonance. A common way to resolve it is by lying to oneself. There are other, more positive solutions too. Cognitive dissonance can also be applied for personal growth.
Now here's where we start to see the cool things about Bruce. He is stubborn, but not stupid. He is a scientist, and he's deeply invested in that identity. So that shapes how he deals with the Other Guy. First we have the idea of falsifiability: a legitimately framed hypothesis is one that could be disproven. A piece of evidence that disproves a hypothesis is often called a white crow, although the falsifiability source article is using black swans instead, and Bruce has a purple balloon. Confirmation bias inclines people to seek only information that agrees with their established stance; good scientists strive to avoid that bad habit. A theory is based on a hypothesis that not only plays out consistently in repeated experiments, but has an accurate predictive factor. A robust theory is one that has survived multiple efforts to alter or disprove it, accounts for all observed phenomena under a wide range of varying conditions, and remains the best explanation of the data. Bruce's observations were "Hulk isn't gentle" (description of previous activity) and "When Hulk appears, things and people WILL get smashed" (prediction). With a person, Hulk might not decide to smash at a given moment but could the next; people are vulnerable but not so fragile. But now Bruce has one example that absolutely cannot fit that: the purple balloon, unpopped, disproves the theory of Hulk as an uncontrollable ragemonster. And when push comes to shove, Bruce's identity "I am a scientist practicing legitimate scientific method" outweighs "Hulk isn't gentle."
[To be continued in Part 5 ...]
(no subject)
Date: 2013-04-26 07:57 am (UTC)--Siren
Yes...
Date: 2013-04-26 07:18 pm (UTC)It has taken them a while to get there, but this is a good breakthrough. It's going to take more time before Hulk gets anything approaching love from Bruce, though. Right now Clint and Phil are the ones providing most of the affection.
>> But I get the feeling Bruce isn't completely ready to trust him all that much around the team, and there's still a long road ahead of them... <<
Yes, that's true. At some point Bruce is going to need another clue-by-four along the lines of trusting the team to gauge and handle potential hazards, as well as trusting Hulk not to smash them. Bruce has an unfortunate amount of history with "People I love hurt me" and "People I love get hurt." Not easy to break, no.
>> love the team's unity here: not leaving Steve alone, and worrying over Bruce. <<
They are much more serious about aftercare than usual for superheroes. It's one of those things people usually overlook in comics/movies. If your body has super-healing, there's not a whole lot that doctors can do for you; mostly you're going to wind up spending a few hours lying down feeling like crap. Hiding alone in your room (which is what Bruce definitely did early on, and probably Steve did too) is not very good self-care.
So as the team meshes over time, they get more determined about taking care of each other, and willingly or grudgingly allow others to take care of them. You can see a big difference between Steve and everyone else because he has positive associations with someone looking after him. It doesn't take long for him to decide that the Avengers are good for that, and take advantage of it. Meanwhile Bruce is still tetchy about being coddled, but will put up with it, and is actively protective of his teammates.
And now I'm wondering if Steve had that as an ulterior motive for planting himself on the couch, as a way of keeping Bruce more within reach. Steve is sneakier than most people realize.
>> Great update, loving every one of them :) <<
Yay! I'm happy to hear that.