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ysabetwordsmithThis story belongs to the series Love Is For Children which includes "Love Is for Children," "Hairpins," "Blended," "Am I Not," "Eggshells," "Dolls and Guys,""Saudades," "Querencia," "Turnabout Is Fair Play," "Touching Moments," "Splash," "Coming Around," "Birthday Girl," "No Winter Lasts Forever," "Hide and Seek," "Kernel Error," "Happy Hour," "Green Eggs and Hulk," and "kintsukuroi."
Fandom: The Avengers
Characters: Phil Coulson, Nick Fury
Medium: Fiction
Warnings: Minor character death. Bullying. Fighting. Suicide attempt (minor character).
Summary: This is the story of how a little boy named Flip grows up to save the world a lot.
Notes: Hurt/comfort. Family. Fluff and angst. Accidents. Emotional whump. Disability. Sibling relationship. Nonsexual love. Parentification. Manipulation. Coping skills. Asking for help and getting it. Hope. Protection. Caregiving. Competence. Toys and games. Comic books. Fixing things. Martial arts. Gentleness. Trust. Role models. Military. BAMF Phil Coulson.
Begin with Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part 9, Part 10, Part 11, Part 12, Part 13, Part 14, Part 15, Part 16, Part 17, Part 18, Part 19, Part 20, Part 21, Part 22, Part 23, Part 24, Part 25, Part 26, Part 27, Part 28, Part 29, Part 30, Part 31, Part 32, Part 33.
"Little and Broken, but Still Good" Part 34
Working at SHIELD means life is never boring and rarely quiet. Phil saves the world a lot, but he does it from the shadows, a ninja hero disappearing before anyone even realizes what really happened, let alone who did it. He's no one special. He's just a guy in a suit, invisible as a janitor. He comes, he cleans up the mess, he goes.
The work is not without cost. Sometimes Phil struggles to maintain his balance between gentleness and ferocity. He holds aikido in one hand and ninjutsu in the other. He's even learning how to blend them together. He tries to use the least possible force to meet his goals, and mostly, he succeeds. Others aren't so lucky.
Phil watches his friend Agent Fury move up the ranks. Agent Fury spends less time in the field and more in clandestine meetings. He becomes Assistant Director, and Phil sees even less of him. After Director Carter retires, Director Fury takes over command. It's harder for Phil to get through to him about ethical concerns, but Phil never gives up.
Of course, Phil earns promotions of his own. It becomes a tradition for him to spend the first few weeks at a new level just going through paperwork that isn't visible to lower security ratings, so that he can improve the forms as needed. Sometimes he discovers things that aren't even covered, so he invents whole new forms to organize that information. Phil becomes quietly famous as a red-tape ninja, not just a martial artist. Nobody wants to get into a paperwork war with him. The new girl, a thoughtful sort named Maria Hill, refers to Phil as "the lost bureaucrat of Byzantium," as if he's some kind of macguffin in an archeology flick. But she helps him keep Director Fury on an even keel, so Phil just smiles blandly and tolerates the nickname.
As a handler, Phil learns how to manage even the most challenging assets -- which, naturally, gets him put in charge of ever more complicated people. Other agents say that he is the mightiest handler SHIELD has ever known. Phil acquires first one and then another damaged assassin, pulling them out of the mercenary life into the shelter of SHIELD. He never gets tired of bringing people in from the cold.
Director Fury and Agent Coulson may butt heads sometimes, but underneath, the connection between Nick and Phil survives. There are compromises, there are sacrifices, and Phil mourns what the job he loves is doing to the friend he admires. But they don't let that stop them. They can't afford to. The world needs them.
A counter-assassination effort almost goes awry when enemy forces get to the target's car and rig it to explode. Phil notices a suspicious smudge on the door in time to tackle the target, but the blast knocks them both into a fire hydrant. The dazed diplomat mumbles her thanks as SHIELD backup scrapes Phil off the pavement.
Phil's last thought before losing consciousness is, Well, there go another four to eight weeks of recovery time before I can get back to my job.
* * *
Notes:
Here you can see hints of what Phil does for SHIELD as "The Cleaner" and "The Fixer" in addition to the more BAMF flavors of fieldwork. He's a guy who makes problems not be problems anymore.
The ethics of compromise reflect on a person's moral character. It's very easy to sacrifice principles in pursuit of goals. This is especially a hazard in certain professional contexts, and it's said that everyone has a price.
Byzantium was legendary for its intricate bureaucracy.
A car bomb, whether triggered by ignition or remote control, is a popular way to get rid of people. An astute observer may notice signs of tampering.
[To be concluded in Part 35 ...]
Fandom: The Avengers
Characters: Phil Coulson, Nick Fury
Medium: Fiction
Warnings: Minor character death. Bullying. Fighting. Suicide attempt (minor character).
Summary: This is the story of how a little boy named Flip grows up to save the world a lot.
Notes: Hurt/comfort. Family. Fluff and angst. Accidents. Emotional whump. Disability. Sibling relationship. Nonsexual love. Parentification. Manipulation. Coping skills. Asking for help and getting it. Hope. Protection. Caregiving. Competence. Toys and games. Comic books. Fixing things. Martial arts. Gentleness. Trust. Role models. Military. BAMF Phil Coulson.
Begin with Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part 9, Part 10, Part 11, Part 12, Part 13, Part 14, Part 15, Part 16, Part 17, Part 18, Part 19, Part 20, Part 21, Part 22, Part 23, Part 24, Part 25, Part 26, Part 27, Part 28, Part 29, Part 30, Part 31, Part 32, Part 33.
"Little and Broken, but Still Good" Part 34
Working at SHIELD means life is never boring and rarely quiet. Phil saves the world a lot, but he does it from the shadows, a ninja hero disappearing before anyone even realizes what really happened, let alone who did it. He's no one special. He's just a guy in a suit, invisible as a janitor. He comes, he cleans up the mess, he goes.
The work is not without cost. Sometimes Phil struggles to maintain his balance between gentleness and ferocity. He holds aikido in one hand and ninjutsu in the other. He's even learning how to blend them together. He tries to use the least possible force to meet his goals, and mostly, he succeeds. Others aren't so lucky.
Phil watches his friend Agent Fury move up the ranks. Agent Fury spends less time in the field and more in clandestine meetings. He becomes Assistant Director, and Phil sees even less of him. After Director Carter retires, Director Fury takes over command. It's harder for Phil to get through to him about ethical concerns, but Phil never gives up.
Of course, Phil earns promotions of his own. It becomes a tradition for him to spend the first few weeks at a new level just going through paperwork that isn't visible to lower security ratings, so that he can improve the forms as needed. Sometimes he discovers things that aren't even covered, so he invents whole new forms to organize that information. Phil becomes quietly famous as a red-tape ninja, not just a martial artist. Nobody wants to get into a paperwork war with him. The new girl, a thoughtful sort named Maria Hill, refers to Phil as "the lost bureaucrat of Byzantium," as if he's some kind of macguffin in an archeology flick. But she helps him keep Director Fury on an even keel, so Phil just smiles blandly and tolerates the nickname.
As a handler, Phil learns how to manage even the most challenging assets -- which, naturally, gets him put in charge of ever more complicated people. Other agents say that he is the mightiest handler SHIELD has ever known. Phil acquires first one and then another damaged assassin, pulling them out of the mercenary life into the shelter of SHIELD. He never gets tired of bringing people in from the cold.
Director Fury and Agent Coulson may butt heads sometimes, but underneath, the connection between Nick and Phil survives. There are compromises, there are sacrifices, and Phil mourns what the job he loves is doing to the friend he admires. But they don't let that stop them. They can't afford to. The world needs them.
A counter-assassination effort almost goes awry when enemy forces get to the target's car and rig it to explode. Phil notices a suspicious smudge on the door in time to tackle the target, but the blast knocks them both into a fire hydrant. The dazed diplomat mumbles her thanks as SHIELD backup scrapes Phil off the pavement.
Phil's last thought before losing consciousness is, Well, there go another four to eight weeks of recovery time before I can get back to my job.
* * *
Notes:
Here you can see hints of what Phil does for SHIELD as "The Cleaner" and "The Fixer" in addition to the more BAMF flavors of fieldwork. He's a guy who makes problems not be problems anymore.
The ethics of compromise reflect on a person's moral character. It's very easy to sacrifice principles in pursuit of goals. This is especially a hazard in certain professional contexts, and it's said that everyone has a price.
Byzantium was legendary for its intricate bureaucracy.
A car bomb, whether triggered by ignition or remote control, is a popular way to get rid of people. An astute observer may notice signs of tampering.
[To be concluded in Part 35 ...]
Concluded??? CONCLUDED??
Date: 2014-08-20 05:41 am (UTC)SIIIGH.
This was a lovely, but it's a shock to realize that it's going to end! But, hopefully, this means you'll be working on the next story, soon!
Re: Concluded??? CONCLUDED??
Date: 2014-08-20 06:04 am (UTC)SIIIGH. <<
Sorry. All good things must come to an end.
>> This was a lovely, but it's a shock to realize that it's going to end! <<
Being told in snippets, it's not the kind of story that can really come to a firm end, I just wanted to get Agent Coulson established and pointed in the direction that will eventually bring him to the Avengers. But it does have a bit of a wrapup.
>> But, hopefully, this means you'll be working on the next story, soon! <<
The next-up piece is a stand-alone. I am working on a short story about Natasha, which I hope to finish soon. I'm also still working on the huge piece about integrating Bucky with the Avengers.
(no subject)
Date: 2014-08-20 05:53 am (UTC)Clint and Natasha, yay!
I also love that he loves bringing people in from the cold. (I know it's sort of a technical term, but the phrase always gives me a mental image of a cozy fireplace, pulling a blanket over their shoulders, and giving them a mug of hot chocolate.) I think it speaks of his compassion and integrity.
I am sad, because it's going to end, but it was a fun journey.
Thank you!
Date: 2014-08-21 11:59 pm (UTC)Hee! I'm glad you like this. It seemed like a logical connection.
>> Clint and Natasha, yay!
I also love that he loves bringing people in from the cold. (I know it's sort of a technical term, but the phrase always gives me a mental image of a cozy fireplace, pulling a blanket over their shoulders, and giving them a mug of hot chocolate.) I think it speaks of his compassion and integrity. <<
I like the cozy imagery too, and I think it speaks well to the past traditions of espionage -- the idea of "coming in" to a safehouse, particularly. With two canonical rescues to his credit, it seems a firmly established part of his personality. In the movieverse we also get to see him reaching out to several of the characters, with varying degrees of success, so it's natural for him to wind up handling the Avengers.
>> I am sad, because it's going to end, but it was a fun journey. <<
There will be more writing later.
(no subject)
Date: 2014-08-20 09:14 am (UTC)I just have to tell you how much this story has meant to me, watching Phil learn how to handle bullying and him protecting his sister and sending money to his family. I love how he copes with paperwork and I love him rewriting the forms. I make lists myself. Lots of lists. Phil has always had a place in my heart and I love the voice you have given him. I'm going to hide back in my lurking hole now.
Mei Mei
Thank you!
Date: 2014-08-21 10:08 pm (UTC)Yay! I'm happy to hear that.
>> I know I don't post much and I am sorry for that. <<
That's okay. Feedback is always welcome but never required. Post at your convenience.
>> It's hard to fight through my anxiety to do so. I am constantly rewriting and judging what I am writing and erasing everything. Sometimes when I go to post I delete it all at last minute because posting is just so very hard, but not today today I will win. I will post this post. <<
Yay for posting!
Overcoming limits like that is hard. Me, I tend to start far more projects than I finish. So finishing is always going to be an accomplishment.
>> I just have to tell you how much this story has meant to me, watching Phil learn how to handle bullying and him protecting his sister and sending money to his family. <<
I wanted to explore how someone with Phil's canonical advantages -- white, male, military -- could have developed the tactics he uses, which are so strongly those of disadvantaged people. So I thought about what challenges he might have faced growing up, and the family context seemed to work.
>> I love how he copes with paperwork and I love him rewriting the forms. I make lists myself. Lots of lists. <<
For some people, organization really helps. I tend to be more freeform but I can see where he's coming from.
>> Phil has always had a place in my heart and I love the voice you have given him. I'm going to hide back in my lurking hole now. <<
I'm glad this story resonates for you.
(no subject)
Date: 2014-08-20 10:27 am (UTC)*chuckle* Oooh, now you've got me thinking about Maria Hill's days as New Girl, and how she relates to Coulson. Excellent.
Well, there go another four to eight weeks of recovery time before I can get back to my job.
Jeez, Phil, let is rest a minute. Listen to some music or something.
Thoughts
Date: 2014-08-20 07:54 pm (UTC)Yay!
>> Jeez, Phil, let is rest a minute. Listen to some music or something. <<
*laugh* He will eventually settle into resting and healing, as we've seen before. He just tends to be a very performance-oriented person.
(no subject)
Date: 2014-08-20 02:02 pm (UTC)Thank you!
Date: 2014-08-21 01:24 am (UTC)Yay! I'm happy to hear that.
>> Thankfully, he continues to be a bureaucratic ninja in the rest of this series, too. :) <<
That's an effect of my fanfic approach, "derive in, extrapolate out." Phil in canon is a mousy little guy who is secretly a BAMF. He can quickly and effortlessly do things like arrange an ironclad fake alibi for a billionaire celebrity; that implies epic paperwork and people-handling ability. I just put some foundation under that, and it carries forward throughout Love Is For Children.
(no subject)
Date: 2014-08-20 08:07 pm (UTC)• There weer
→ were
Thoughts
Date: 2014-08-21 07:27 pm (UTC)I've been using snippets to show some of the more momentous events in Phil's life prior to the movie canon, so yes, almost done now. There will be more writing about other things later.
>> • There weer
→ were <<
I'm not finding "weer" even with the search function.
Re: Thoughts
Date: 2014-08-21 07:55 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2014-08-20 11:19 pm (UTC)Yes...
Date: 2014-08-21 12:39 am (UTC)Re: Yes...
Date: 2014-08-21 02:49 am (UTC)Re: Yes...
Date: 2014-08-21 03:28 am (UTC)Another Nick Fury influence
Date: 2014-09-05 02:41 pm (UTC)Re: Another Nick Fury influence
Date: 2014-09-08 05:21 am (UTC)That does apply to some versions of Marvel canon, and is plausible here.
>> If his moral fiber wasn't quite so solid and well-aligned as Steve's (possible), <<
It never was. Steve is 1 in 36.
>> he might have had other aspects magnified instead... like his dedication to the cause, and his drive for action (together leading to attempts to get results or die trying; good for heroism under fire, not so much for leadership at the rear). Magnify his charisma and ability to manipulate others (things that people give leadership for). <<
Yes, exactly.
>> Then twist that with shady bosses and a Tesseract for a while, and watch his ethics give way to his other drives. <<
It's sad to watch, especially when I reach back to try finding examples of what Phil saw in Nick earlier on.