Story: "Hairpins" Part 15
Mar. 24th, 2014 12:08 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
ysabetwordsmithThis story belongs to the series Love Is For Children which includes "Love Is for Children," "Eggshells," "Dolls and Guys,""Saudades," "Turnabout Is Fair Play," "Touching Moments," "Splash," "Coming Around," "Birthday Girl," "No Winter Lasts Forever," "Hide and Seek," "Kernel Error," "Happy Hour," and "Green Eggs and Hulk."
Fandom: The Avengers
Characters: Phil Coulson, JARVIS, Clint Barton, Tony Stark, Steve Rogers, Natasha Romanova, Bruce Banner.
Medium: Fiction
Warnings: This story is mostly fluff, but it has some intense scenes in the middle. Highlight for details. These include dubious consent as Phil and JARVIS discuss what really happened when Agent Coulson hacked his way into Stark Tower, over which Phil has something between a flashback and a panic attack. They also discuss some of the bad things that have happened to Avengers in the past, including various flavors of abuse. If these are sensitive topics for you, please think carefully before deciding whether to read onward.
Summary: Uncle Phil needs to pick out pajamas for game night. He gets help from an unexpected direction.
Notes: Service. Shopping. Gifts. Artificial intelligence. Computers. Teamwork. Team as family. Friendship. Communication. Hope. Apologies. Forgiveness. Nonsexual ageplay. Nonsexual intimacy. Love. Tony Stark needs a hug. Bruce Banner needs a hug. #coulsonlives.
Begin with Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part 9, Part 10, Part 11, Part 12, Part 13, Part 14. Skip to Part 17, Part 18, Part 19, Part 20.
"Hairpins" Part 15
Phil sighed. He picked out a handful of least-unlikely botanical patterns and saved them. Then he cleared the page again. "How about ordinary kiddie things," he said.
JARVIS obliged by calling up a fresh set of images. Unfortunately the selections here tended to be overly gendered, something that annoyed Phil in general when shopping for his littles. The prevailing blue palette was fine, but not the endless array of soldiers, cowboys, and knights. The subtle implication of conflict undercut the desired sense of comfort. Phil did not think that Bruce would like pajamas decorated with trains or backhoes any better. Judging from the sluggish rate of suggestions, neither did JARVIS.
"This doesn't feel right," Phil admitted. "Bruce doesn't have many positive memories of childhood. I'm not sure reprising that would help."
"It may be that we are approaching this from the wrong angle," JARVIS said. "What does Bruce get out of game night?"
"Safety," Phil said at once. "It helps him feel more secure about his place in the team. He's learning to express his emotions, now that people respect them. He likes being allowed to hide if that's what he needs."
"Protective camouflage," JARVIS murmured.
Phil shook his head. "No, Bruce hates the Army. We can't put him in camo."
"I was referring to cryptic coloration as it appears in nature, allowing animals to blend into their environment," JARVIS clarified. "For example, female birds often have drab plumage to disguise themselves while nesting."
"Bruce likes to blend in," Phil said. "He dresses to deflect attention from himself. Sometimes he acts as if he wants to sink into the carpet and disappear."
"He also avoids observation as much as possible -- not just on a physical level, as with shying away from cameras, but also on a psychological level," JARVIS said. "Bruce dislikes it when people try to read him. Sir is the only person who seems able to coax him out of his shell."
"At least they have Candyland," Phil said. Not long after the team moved into the tower, Tony had redesigned part of the lab space so that he and Bruce could share it. He also printed out an enormous sign with the title in classic candycane font, which he hung above the main door. It dated all the way back to some in-joke that Tony and Bruce had shared on the Helicarrier.
Phil flipped back to the collection of images he had of Bruce's clothes. Most were solids, but there were some with subtle patterns of stripes or dots, along with several soft plaids.
"Plaid is a traditional pattern for sleepwear," JARVIS remarked. "Children tend to dress in bright colors, but Bruce would probably prefer something quieter. The lines of a neutral plaid would blend into an indoor environment rather well."
"Good idea," Phil said. "Pull me some samples." The screen filled with fabric swatches in shades of brown and tan, similar to clothes that Bruce had worn in the past. Soon Phil found a nice mellow caramel. "Given Bruce's tendency to go through clothes quickly, we should probably pick more than one."
* * *
Notes:
Gendered clothes for children are a fairly recent phenomenon. This can restrict gender fluidity and cause problems for children. At this stage, Phil does not know what potential landmines he just avoided, but Bruce has some serious and deeply buried gender issues thanks to Brian Banner's A+ parenting, as seen in "Dolls and Guys" Part 10. Several of the Avengers are a little gender-variant in certain regards.
Gendered toys raise similar issues, hence Uncle Phil's resentment. They illustrate and enforce gender roles, causing difficulties for boys and girls alike. Note that Uncle Phil stocks the toy cabinet primarily with gender-neutral toys such as blocks and board games. Where there are gender-associated toys like dolls and trains, he encourages everyone to play with all of them, not split up by gender. There are only two girls in the group, and Natka isn't very girly; Betty is more likely to wind up playing girl things with Steve, Bruce, or Tony who all have different feminine aspects. Browse some good choices in gender-neutral toys.
Blending into a crowd is a useful skill for travel and survival. There are tips for blending in, avoiding attention, and not getting picked out of a crowd. (Notice the repeated advice on wearing drab, plain clothes.) This is what allows Bruce to thrive in foreign lands, as well as locally, and to elude capture most of the time.
Camouflage lets creatures to fade into their environment using multiple techniques. Here are some examples of protective camouflage in animals. Birds can adapt their camouflage, and often the females have dull colors for nesting safety.
Candyland is a game with editions in 1949, 1978, and other years. This box for the 1978 game shows the candycane font. Tony and Bruce would probably recognize this version, hence Tony's reference to it in The Avengers.
Plaid is a popular pajama pattern for children and adults.
Read about the symbolism for the color brown.
[To be continued in Part 16 ...]
Fandom: The Avengers
Characters: Phil Coulson, JARVIS, Clint Barton, Tony Stark, Steve Rogers, Natasha Romanova, Bruce Banner.
Medium: Fiction
Warnings: This story is mostly fluff, but it has some intense scenes in the middle. Highlight for details. These include dubious consent as Phil and JARVIS discuss what really happened when Agent Coulson hacked his way into Stark Tower, over which Phil has something between a flashback and a panic attack. They also discuss some of the bad things that have happened to Avengers in the past, including various flavors of abuse. If these are sensitive topics for you, please think carefully before deciding whether to read onward.
Summary: Uncle Phil needs to pick out pajamas for game night. He gets help from an unexpected direction.
Notes: Service. Shopping. Gifts. Artificial intelligence. Computers. Teamwork. Team as family. Friendship. Communication. Hope. Apologies. Forgiveness. Nonsexual ageplay. Nonsexual intimacy. Love. Tony Stark needs a hug. Bruce Banner needs a hug. #coulsonlives.
Begin with Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part 9, Part 10, Part 11, Part 12, Part 13, Part 14. Skip to Part 17, Part 18, Part 19, Part 20.
"Hairpins" Part 15
Phil sighed. He picked out a handful of least-unlikely botanical patterns and saved them. Then he cleared the page again. "How about ordinary kiddie things," he said.
JARVIS obliged by calling up a fresh set of images. Unfortunately the selections here tended to be overly gendered, something that annoyed Phil in general when shopping for his littles. The prevailing blue palette was fine, but not the endless array of soldiers, cowboys, and knights. The subtle implication of conflict undercut the desired sense of comfort. Phil did not think that Bruce would like pajamas decorated with trains or backhoes any better. Judging from the sluggish rate of suggestions, neither did JARVIS.
"This doesn't feel right," Phil admitted. "Bruce doesn't have many positive memories of childhood. I'm not sure reprising that would help."
"It may be that we are approaching this from the wrong angle," JARVIS said. "What does Bruce get out of game night?"
"Safety," Phil said at once. "It helps him feel more secure about his place in the team. He's learning to express his emotions, now that people respect them. He likes being allowed to hide if that's what he needs."
"Protective camouflage," JARVIS murmured.
Phil shook his head. "No, Bruce hates the Army. We can't put him in camo."
"I was referring to cryptic coloration as it appears in nature, allowing animals to blend into their environment," JARVIS clarified. "For example, female birds often have drab plumage to disguise themselves while nesting."
"Bruce likes to blend in," Phil said. "He dresses to deflect attention from himself. Sometimes he acts as if he wants to sink into the carpet and disappear."
"He also avoids observation as much as possible -- not just on a physical level, as with shying away from cameras, but also on a psychological level," JARVIS said. "Bruce dislikes it when people try to read him. Sir is the only person who seems able to coax him out of his shell."
"At least they have Candyland," Phil said. Not long after the team moved into the tower, Tony had redesigned part of the lab space so that he and Bruce could share it. He also printed out an enormous sign with the title in classic candycane font, which he hung above the main door. It dated all the way back to some in-joke that Tony and Bruce had shared on the Helicarrier.
Phil flipped back to the collection of images he had of Bruce's clothes. Most were solids, but there were some with subtle patterns of stripes or dots, along with several soft plaids.
"Plaid is a traditional pattern for sleepwear," JARVIS remarked. "Children tend to dress in bright colors, but Bruce would probably prefer something quieter. The lines of a neutral plaid would blend into an indoor environment rather well."
"Good idea," Phil said. "Pull me some samples." The screen filled with fabric swatches in shades of brown and tan, similar to clothes that Bruce had worn in the past. Soon Phil found a nice mellow caramel. "Given Bruce's tendency to go through clothes quickly, we should probably pick more than one."
* * *
Notes:
Gendered clothes for children are a fairly recent phenomenon. This can restrict gender fluidity and cause problems for children. At this stage, Phil does not know what potential landmines he just avoided, but Bruce has some serious and deeply buried gender issues thanks to Brian Banner's A+ parenting, as seen in "Dolls and Guys" Part 10. Several of the Avengers are a little gender-variant in certain regards.
Gendered toys raise similar issues, hence Uncle Phil's resentment. They illustrate and enforce gender roles, causing difficulties for boys and girls alike. Note that Uncle Phil stocks the toy cabinet primarily with gender-neutral toys such as blocks and board games. Where there are gender-associated toys like dolls and trains, he encourages everyone to play with all of them, not split up by gender. There are only two girls in the group, and Natka isn't very girly; Betty is more likely to wind up playing girl things with Steve, Bruce, or Tony who all have different feminine aspects. Browse some good choices in gender-neutral toys.
Blending into a crowd is a useful skill for travel and survival. There are tips for blending in, avoiding attention, and not getting picked out of a crowd. (Notice the repeated advice on wearing drab, plain clothes.) This is what allows Bruce to thrive in foreign lands, as well as locally, and to elude capture most of the time.
Camouflage lets creatures to fade into their environment using multiple techniques. Here are some examples of protective camouflage in animals. Birds can adapt their camouflage, and often the females have dull colors for nesting safety.
Candyland is a game with editions in 1949, 1978, and other years. This box for the 1978 game shows the candycane font. Tony and Bruce would probably recognize this version, hence Tony's reference to it in The Avengers.
Plaid is a popular pajama pattern for children and adults.
Read about the symbolism for the color brown.
[To be continued in Part 16 ...]
Re: Thank you!
Date: 2014-03-29 05:19 am (UTC)Steve was always more than meets the eye. The serum just made his outside match his inside. Good becomes great, and smart becomes brilliant.
>> Now, he finds someone that can see him and not just the muscles and the Legend... <<
*smirk* I do have something in mind.
>> Peggy had it easier, since she did see him as all pluck. <<
That's true. It's harder for people later to understand Steve, because they've only seen part of him. Inside, he's still the skinny kid from Brooklyn, and that colors a lot of his behavior.
Re: Thank you!
Date: 2014-03-29 06:24 am (UTC)Re: Thank you!
Date: 2014-03-29 06:31 am (UTC)I'm not sure. She knows who Steve is, the divergence between his chronological and subjective ages, some of what happened to him but not all the classified stuff. Her awareness of his personal damage is probably patchy.
I suspect that only Bucky knows -- because he was there -- a lot of the subtle things that tie into Steve's former size/health. Phil has some inklings because he and Steve and Bucky have talked about that, but most of it was in the category of baggage that got ignored during the war. Steve is just starting to deal with these things.
>> (It'd be easy to forget how much assumptions don't hold over 60+ years, across class...) <<
True. Betty is likely to snap at certain types of behavior or lines, out of habit. But she knows that Steve is a gentleman at heart, not supportive of any kind of oppression, and not willfully inclined to insult people. Once she stops to think, she'll be more gentle with him.
A key factor here is that Steve, like Phil, will immediately backpedal if he makes a mistake. Now contrast that with Thor's tendency to keep bulling forward until someone drops a tank on him.
Re: Thank you!
Date: 2014-03-29 06:52 am (UTC)So, might not know outright just how much change, and might not know what scramble NYC was like in his day. Or the difference doing something X all the time, as opposed to for a week or two at a time.
Re: Thank you!
Date: 2014-03-29 07:31 am (UTC)And apologize. Basically, if Steve realizes he is short of a clue, he'll start searching for one. Easy to fix.
Thor doesn't even notice that a clue is in play, because clues are Loki's department, and without his brother there to prompt him, Thor hardly knows where to start. Which is why people hit him with things. No wonder poor Darcy wanted to tear her hair out, trying to handle Eric and Jane AND Thor.
>> So, might not know outright just how much change, and might not know what scramble NYC was like in his day. <<
Exactly. Betty would know general things about the Depression, but not all the little details. Steve would know that things have changed, but it's exhausting to learn which ones have changed and how, vs. what has stayed the same. He feels blindsided a lot.
>> Or the difference doing something X all the time, as opposed to for a week or two at a time. <<
That's a big one. It makes a difference between Betty, who had a decent lifestyle aside from her control-freak father, compared to some others Avengers spending a lot of time in poverty. And Tony misses things because he grew up rich, if emotionally starved. Having things without love is as ruinous as having no things, but in a different way.
Re: Thank you!
Date: 2014-03-29 11:58 am (UTC)Yeah, Clint might grasp Bucky and Steve better in some ways. Steve would probably feel more for Clint. Just because it was normal then but clearly wasn't by 'then'.
Betty though was able to deal with Bruce while he figured out some grooming basics.
How old was he at Event, and what was done with him between then and college?
Re: Thank you!
Date: 2014-03-30 07:38 am (UTC)*laugh*
1) Open tuna can.
2) Yell "Here kitty kitty!"
3) Walk in direction you want cats to go.
>> Yeah, Clint might grasp Bucky and Steve better in some ways. Steve would probably feel more for Clint. Just because it was normal then but clearly wasn't by 'then'. <<
Yes, exactly. They have some common ground, even if it's difficult.
>> Betty though was able to deal with Bruce while he figured out some grooming basics. <<
She is a lot of the reason he is even still sane and functional. Betty was able to help Bruce fill in some gaps, and she was a very soothing influence. Then losing her cut his legs out from under him all over again.
>> How old was he at Event, <<
Toddler, as in one of the movies, which is why Bruce-and-Hulk are stuck that way in some regards.
>> and what was done with him between then and college? <<
I'm not sure. We know from his condition what didn't happen: he didn't wind up in a secure situation that helped him heal. So, either he got fobbed off on a mediocre or neglectful relative; or he bummed around the foster care system until he aged out of it. I tend to suspect the latter because Bruce is compulsive about making himself of use, expects people to dump him, and has no real sense of "home."
Trigger warnings: Bruce Banner backstory
Date: 2014-03-30 11:56 am (UTC)I thought his mother is killed when he's older, though yes Hulk comes into being when they are toddlers. Probably the only thing that kept his fawn response from getting him dead.
If he was old enough once the trials were over he might have rattled about and gotten finagled off to a boarding school because the judge knew someone that owed him a favor to deal with this unwashed genius. Bruce is right where someone might be willing to stand upwind and defend him as their goose, enough to get short attention-span bullies to move along. Even at twelve Bruce would have been closer to grown, than Tony at sixteen.
Re: Trigger warnings: Bruce Banner backstory
Date: 2014-03-31 07:12 am (UTC)Yes, it can be sometimes.
And Steve does little better when the shoe is on the other foot. Poor Bucky, looking after him all this time and getting mostly bitched at because Steve's feelings were too raw for him to be polite about the fact that Bucky had to keep saving his bacon. They still haven't dealt with that; Steve isn't ready for it.
>> I thought his mother is killed when he's older, though yes Hulk comes into being when they are toddlers. Probably the only thing that kept his fawn response from getting him dead. <<
It's possible.
>> If he was old enough once the trials were over he might have rattled about and gotten finagled off to a boarding school because the judge knew someone that owed him a favor to deal with this unwashed genius. <<
That's another option, yes.
>> Bruce is right where someone might be willing to stand upwind and defend him as their goose, enough to get short attention-span bullies to move along. <<
Or just want to puppet him.
>> Even at twelve Bruce would have been closer to grown, than Tony at sixteen. <<
Remember that Hulk, not Bruce, is the emotional genius of the pair. Even "difficult," Tony is far better at dealing with people than Bruce, because Tony has a gregarious mode and Bruce really doesn't.
Re: Trigger warnings: Bruce Banner backstory
Date: 2014-03-31 07:25 am (UTC)Remember that Hulk, not Bruce, is the emotional genius of the pair. Even "difficult," Tony is far better at dealing with people than Bruce, because Tony has a gregarious mode and Bruce really doesn't.
Not a grown-up, just closer to looking like a man than a boy. And his father killed his mother.
Re: Trigger warnings: Bruce Banner backstory
Date: 2014-04-14 01:33 am (UTC)Re: Trigger warnings: Bruce Banner backstory
Date: 2014-04-14 04:02 am (UTC)Re: Trigger warnings: Bruce Banner backstory
Date: 2014-04-14 09:26 pm (UTC)Yeah, Bruce doesn't trust himself as far as he could throw the Hulk. It's very sad. Bruce is trustworthy, and his teammates are learning that. But he almost never says "trust me." He says "try me" or "test me" instead. Which is helpful with people who have grounds to be skittish of medical personnel, but it's an awful example of his own mindstate.
>> I think Hulk is getting tarred with *spit* Brian Banner's brush, just as Bruce can't always look himself in the mirror without seeing his father. <<
Absolutely. Abuse can do a horrific amount of damage. It's possible that in addition to the emotional impact, Bruce may have bought into the false logic that "abused children become abusers."
And boy howdy, but I'd like to take a tar brush to Daddy. Followed by copious amounts of feathers, which would be pink, because he is a misogynist and I am a sadist.
Re: Trigger warnings: Bruce Banner backstory
Date: 2014-04-15 02:02 am (UTC)Bruce has got the "hair on his chest" that once was spoken of so highly.
Pink with a big yellow stripe down *spit* BB's back.
Re: Trigger warnings: Bruce Banner backstory
Date: 2014-04-16 02:15 am (UTC)Undoubtedly. That's another reason why Bruce and Tony are so very careful with Bucky, and for that matter Steve too. They know what it's like being treated as an object. Some phrases work, others really don't.
>> Bruce has got the "hair on his chest" that once was spoken of so highly. <<
"Also cute and fluffy!"
>> Pink with a big yellow stripe down *spit* BB's back. <<
Heh. Yeah.
Re: Trigger warnings: Bruce Banner backstory
Date: 2014-04-16 02:57 am (UTC)Have you seen the Hello Winter Soldier?
Re: Trigger warnings: Bruce Banner backstory
Date: 2014-04-17 08:35 am (UTC)Heh. Yeah.
>> Have you seen the Hello Winter Soldier? <<
I've seen the movie, but not whatever Hello you're referring to.
Spoiler warnings:was Bruce Banner backstory
Date: 2014-04-17 02:54 pm (UTC)Do not drink liquids while operating this link.
Watch the movie first. Captain America 2, hopefully in a theater near you.
Hello
Re: Spoiler warnings:was Bruce Banner backstory
Date: 2014-04-17 09:13 pm (UTC)HYDRA agent: "Scheiss! What happened to YOU?"
Winter Soldier: "There was a ... complication. His name was Loki. Please shoot me now."
Still Spoilers Re: Spoiler warnings:was Bruce Banner backstory
Date: 2014-04-18 01:43 am (UTC)