Hard Things

[ysabetwordsmith]

Life is full of things which are hard or tedious or otherwise unpleasant that need doing anyhow. They help make the world go 'round, they improve skills, and they boost your sense of self-respect. But doing them still kinda sucks. It's all the more difficult to do those things when nobody appreciates it. Happily, blogging allows us to share our accomplishments and pat each other on the back.

What are some of the hard things you've done recently? What are some hard things you haven't gotten to yet, but need to do?

Comments

[technoshaman]

Moving. DONE. Comparatively non-sucky but moving ALWAYS sucks.

Leaving my Desti-cat behind in a place where both she and I will be happier. (She needs people around as much of the time as she can get. I'm gone ten hours a day and asleep six to seven.)

Getting woke up by the boy-cats at 0330 (them discovering how to open the closet with the food in it) and again at 0600 (by pulling the curtain down not *quite* on top of me)... oof. My residual stress levels were more than they'd been in MONTHS.

Spending the last eighteen months working on the little grey cells so that the cranky from getting woke up by the boy-cats TWICE didn't even splatter much on *me*, much less on anyone else, two-foots or four. I was *grumbly* at the four-foots, but not snappish, and did not snap at any of the two foots at all. That was a LOT of work, some of it hard, some of it tedious, but dammit, I'm better than I was. Rather a lot.

Yay!

[ysabetwordsmith]

Progress is good.

[alexseanchai]

I am sorry that you will miss your kitty and I hope she is in fact happier

being better than you were is v good payoff for hard work

[pronker]

Glad to hear moving is complete and hoping that all is on an even keel - that ought to make it less work to just live day to day.

[lilly_c]

Dealing with Aberdeen Council’s repairs services for the last couple of weeks after part of my bathroom floor caved in late at night. After having three emergency temporary repairs and far too many phone calls, the work to replace the floor is starting today.

Starting the editing on my huge shipper essay and trying not to miss too many mistakes and it is turning into something much more bigger than expected it to be.

Thoughts

[ysabetwordsmith]

Blargh. I wish you luck with that.

[technoshaman]

Yeep! Presumably the plumbing and/or roofing issue that caused that (am assuming something got wet and rotted) is being addressed as well?

Editing ALWAYS sucks. Like moving. Sympathy.

[alexseanchai]

oh joy

sympathy and strength

[pronker]

Good luck on the flooring issue; we just don't realize the infrastructure that goes on beneath our feet until it's exposed. Yay for essay! :)

[talewisefellowship]

I somehow managed to pick up my library book after my first day of archaeology field school, bike home and eventually finish today's field journal even though for much of that time I was suffering from migraine and the aftereffects of motion sickness and had to rest it all off. And all on a mostly empty stomach! (turns out eating while recovering from motion sickness is a bad idea, you will get sick again, so i had to nap it off, then eat)

--janusz

Thoughts

[ysabetwordsmith]

>> I somehow managed to pick up my library book after my first day of archaeology field school, bike home and eventually finish today's field journal <<

Yay!

>> even though for much of that time I was suffering from migraine and the aftereffects of motion sickness and had to rest it all off. <<

Boo!

>> And all on a mostly empty stomach! (turns out eating while recovering from motion sickness is a bad idea, you will get sick again, so i had to nap it off, then eat) <<

Depends on the person and the food.

* Many people can't eat when queasy or they feel worse.

* But some people get sick just from having an empty stomach, so they have to try eating something light, or it'll just get worse.

* Also most people find dry heaving monumentally worse than throwing up something. Drinking a little water or eating something like ice cream or applesauce is better than nothing.

* Anything greasy, heavy, too sweet, etc. is hard on the stomach.

* Light, easily digestible foods are good. BRAT is safe for most folks.

* In general, avoid strong flavors such as spices. But some herbs and spices can ease nausea. Ginger, peppermint, fennel, and chamomile are just a few.

* Some people find that strong odors make headaches worse, especially migraines.

* Other folks always carry their favorite essential oil blend for headaches. Again, there are lots of options, but lavender and peppermint seems to be popular.

Do what works for your body.

[technoshaman]

YEEP. Empathy. Closest I ever came to wanting to Not Be was a bad case of motion sick... "just make it STOP!"

I hope your recovery was as successful as mine was... once we got back under way and the sickies stopped, I got some ginger ale and a pack of crackers and got things settled, and by the time we made port I was ready for *barbecue*...

[gingicat]

The first hard thing I have to do is get through each day until daughter is at her overnight therapeutic summer program (July 5).

Then I have to spend the time she’s away getting adjusted to taking synthroid. (Synthroid seems to make all my bipolar and ADHD issues worse because my brain isn’t used to going that much faster. And the generic dosage is poorly controlled. However, I’m getting joint pain.) My brain going faster will mean it’s harder to be on parallel tracks and make me impatient with everyone else who already can’t run on parallel tracks because of their own executive dysfunction.

But I’ll just keep moving forward...

[technoshaman]

I hope you're getting the generic rather than the brand name you mention? it seems (according to the sources I've read) that the quality control on the generics are actually BETTER than on the brand...

Definite empathy for all of the effects of low T4. Brrrr. I hope I never have to go back there...

Also, suggestion, to take or leave: Set one of the parallel tracks as an empathy monitor? That way you can get ahead of the "oh they can't do that" backlash... Hopefully as you get used to being up to speed that will optimise out as not taking a lot of resources, but meantime having that soaking up some of the going faster will make it smoother for everybody, yourself included. One hopes, anyway. Good luck! Any sort of head meds are HARD...

[alexseanchai]

Asked for help.

Need to clean apartment AAAAAAAA

[technoshaman]

Empathy. So. Much.

[(Anonymous)]

Clockworklady: I've just finished a university class, gotten over a cold/hives/scalp psoriasis, helped my boyfriend sort out things for moving (including putting clothes in my storage), finished an important work task, got sleepless over the cold nights. As my current job could end in a month, I freaked out and paid some bills months in advance. Yep, that was sensible.
Thankfully, I was able to get a storage container big enough for two cardboard boxes of children's books. I'm definitely getting one for the box of children's clothes because cardboard gets holes and silverfish nasties. Some of my brother's things were found and boxed up for him. I haven't decluttered much myself, but actually putting like things with like has meant that it'll easier for me to decide what to keep. I have removed some things of mine that have unhappy memories attached. It's about a shopping bag worth per week of things donated or given to co-workers/workplace. Things that can't be used by anyone have been recycled. Things that really aren't mine have been moved to the linen cupboard. I want to make space for things I want. I'm tackling the little wants to build up to the big wants.

[alexseanchai]

hot damn that's a lot of work

good on the advance bills

[redsixwing]

Did House Things. Some of these are difficult. All of them are expensive. /o\

I'm trying again to break my ridiculous fear of spider webs. Not the spiders, just the webs - and I mean, yell, flinch away from them, shy like a horse spotting Something Bad. Buh.

I have had some success attacking spiderweb with a cleaning wand, and recently just a plain stick. So long as I stop before getting too reactive to it, it seems to be okay.

Hopefully I can find a way to handle this more permanently, because not being able to de-cobweb the things that need it only results in more gross.

[alexseanchai]

♥

*pompoms*

[we_are_spc]

I have clients-I have 1 semi-regular who works in NCC; I just got a regular yestereay (He'll be back on June 12)...and because of the second client yesterday (And after spending $50 on the third week in may, and purchasing an unused table for $75) I only yhalf the rent for the month of June $100; the reng is $200)...and I had to ask the mother for the rest of it.

I hate this. I hate having to ask for so much money all at once because my expenses take me so damn close to the line it's rediculous.

I know it'll level out, but right now, I hate it, dammit.

And they keep telling me not to give up on going to job interviews, but there are only so many places in Marien county, and most of them never got back to me, or want too much experience...and CL was a bust because too many crazies. *sighs*

-Fallon~

Thoughts

[ysabetwordsmith]

>> I have clients-I have 1 semi-regular who works in NCC; I just got a regular yestereay (He'll be back on June 12)<<

Yay!

>> I only yhalf the rent for the month of June $100; the reng is $200)...and I had to ask the mother for the rest of it.<<

That sucks mightily. :(

>> And they keep telling me not to give up on going to job interviews <<

It's easy for people to say when they're not the one spending all their time and spoons begging for a job and enduring repeated rejections. That's a very high cost.

[(Anonymous)]

1

[wispfox]

I have been job hunting - as part of a career transition after leaving grad school for my sanity - for over two years now.

I am still looking, though! It's so hard to keep looking when nothing wants to pan out.

Thoughts

[ysabetwordsmith]

Wow, that sucks. :(

[satsuma]

I’ve got two credits lef of high school & exactly a year to do them befote I age out of being legally entitled to a free education in the US

The good news is they’re letting me do them online so I can keep making progress even when my sleep schedules incompatible with other humans. The bad news is they only have one online class program and its main usecase is kids who failed classes making them up over the summer so it’s meant to be really easy, and therefore is abominably boring which is wreaking havoc on my motivation

Thoughts

[ysabetwordsmith]

Bummer.

It still seems weird to think of summer school as something for bad students. When I was little, only nerds did summer school.

[readera]

Still dealing with ongoing anxiety + new job stress. I am good at my job, damn it. Mistakes happen and are expected. To help with that I am trying to practice positive self-talk, as most of my issues seem to come from lots of negative self-talk.

I made breakfast tacos that J approved of & that only needed 2 small do-able changes to be great! I cleaned the dishes from that + the day when I got home from work. I also made banana bread, which is currently baking.

J & I spent a good 30 minutes getting a tiny mat out of our dog's fur tonight. It was close to the skin & right behind his ear, so he really squirmed. But we got it out without injury to anyone, dog included.

[mashfanficchick]

Did: finish my class for the semester.

Working on: not enabling/gietting roped into my mom’s poor financial choices

Did not (yet): get wisdom tooth/teeth removed

Ugh

[fuzzyred]

I bought my first house. House hunting was a lot of work and stressful, plus the market here is crazy so finding a good house for a decent price was pretty much impossible. Now I have to go through all the closing requirements and then buy furniture amd stuff. I'm currently living at home so hopefully moving won't be too bad but I'm not really looking forward to that.

Re: Ugh

[ysabetwordsmith]

>> I bought my first house. <<

Congratulations!

>>I'm currently living at home so hopefully moving won't be too bad but I'm not really looking forward to that.<<

Moving always sucks. It sucks slightly less if you have good friends to help and can afford or scrounge proper supplies. But definitely plan to reward yourself later.

[dreamwriteremmy]

We called Medicaid to switch our insurance so we can go to the community health center (which is walking distance). Now we just have to wait for the paperwork so we can do that and work on the slow process of transitioning care to up here

When all the options are frustratingly poor ones, making the best choice you can is a win

[mashfanficchick]

I may have to stop inviting my mom over to my place.

When I moved out (read: when my dad decided to rent an apartment for me so I could practice independence), it was to an apartment only two blocks away from where I’d lived with my mom, and where she still lives. This was seen as a good thing.

As I did better and she did worse (both in assorted ways, including mental/physical/emotional/financial), I would invite her over a few times a week, so I could feed her (I like cooking and she hates it, plus I can afford to feed her better than she can) and so we could hang out together, as we enjoy doing.

Lately, though, I’ve been realizing that I can’t keep expending the amount of energy it costs to get her to leave. She always has an excuse for why she wants to stay at my apartment...my STUDIO apartment. I’ve actually finally gotten really good at telling her no...but it takes a long time and a lot of energy, and it frequently ends with her being upset about it. This does not seem healthy.

But, if I stop inviting her over...she doesn’t really have—this sounds awful—a life. She won’t go anywhere or see anyone, and she probably won’t eat well, either. But I have to start taking care of myself, putting my own oxygen mask on first, as we say in caregiving.

Sorry. I didn’t mean to pile this here. It’s just that she just left (finally), and I really needed to say it, but I don’t really have anywhere at the moment where RL relatives can’t see what I post.

I really need to move my LJ over to DW. Maybe that’ll be my self-care assignment for next week.

I feel better now. Thank you. I feel a little bit bad about using this thread as an emotional garbage can, but...well, it sort of invites it, in a good way. It says “tell me your troubles and let me remind you of your successes.” Thank you for hosting it.

Re: When all the options are frustratingly poor ones, making the best choice you can is a win

[ysabetwordsmith]

>>I may have to stop inviting my mom over to my place.<<

Bummer.

>>Lately, though, I’ve been realizing that I can’t keep expending the amount of energy it costs to get her to leave. She always has an excuse for why she wants to stay at my apartment...my STUDIO apartment. I’ve actually finally gotten really good at telling her no...but it takes a long time and a lot of energy, and it frequently ends with her being upset about it. This does not seem healthy.<<

I agree, that does not seem healthy. :(

>> But, if I stop inviting her over...she doesn’t really have—this sounds awful—a life. She won’t go anywhere or see anyone, and she probably won’t eat well, either.<<

That's sad.

>> But I have to start taking care of myself, putting my own oxygen mask on first, as we say in caregiving. <<

True. That makes it a good idea to stop inviting your mother to your apartment.

However, it doesn't necessarily mean abandoning her. You could explore other alternatives. Perhaps you could invite her to a coffeehouse or a movie. Businesses have hours when they close, which makes a natural stopping point. You might also look for programs aimed at people like her. She may or may not be interested, but if you offer resources, the choice is up to her and at least you did something.

>>I really need to move my LJ over to DW. Maybe that’ll be my self-care assignment for next week.<<

That sounds good.

>> I feel better now. <<

Yay!

>> Thank you. I feel a little bit bad about using this thread as an emotional garbage can, but...well, it sort of invites it, in a good way. It says “tell me your troubles and let me remind you of your successes.” Thank you for hosting it.<<

You're welcome. And that is exactly what this thread is for. It gives people a place to share the challenges in their life with some sympathetic friends. I can't do much about the generally disconnected state of communities today, but I can provide a venue for support in my little corner of the internet.