Poem: "Fall into Despair"
Nov. 23rd, 2021 04:12 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
ysabetwordsmithThis poem was written outside the regular prompt calls. It fills the "Autumn" square in my 10-1-21 card for the Fall Festival Bingo. It has been sponsored by a pool with ng_moonmoth. This poem belongs to the Rutledge thread of the Polychrome Heroics series. It is followed by "Leave Behind Their Shadows," "A Matter of Balance," and "The Basic Source of Peace."
WARNING: This poem contains material that may disturb many readers. All hurt, no comfort. Highlight to read the warnings, some of which are spoilers. It includes war-typical violence, traumatic loss, ruins, refugees, separation, human smuggling, violent repulsion of a refugee boat causing it to sink, mass casualties including child deaths, loss of faith, and other mayhem. If these are touchy topics for you, please consider your tastes and headspace before deciding whether this is something you want to read. It introduces new characters, so skipping it would leave a gap; but you could summarize it as "awful refugee past" and pick up with the later poems.
"Fall into Despair"
[Late 2013]
Ahzan Laham had grown up
in Damascus, Syria where
he married Lamya and soon
started a family of his own.
They were two young people
who clung to each other amidst
an increasingly desperate situation
as the civil war heated up, and
although their fathers arranged
the marriage, Ahzan and Lamya
became quite fond of each other.
They had two older sons and
three younger daughters together.
Ahzan worked as a porter
at an international hotel chain;
Lamya worked as a maid; and
Ahzan's mother took care of
the children during the day.
So Ahzan managed to learn
English tolerably well and he
collected tips in European cash.
That autumn, increased fighting
in and around Damascus
killed several members of
Ahzan's extended family.
Then another deadly skirmish
collapsed their apartment building,
which killed Ahzan's father and
most of Lamya's family except
for her favorite uncle Baaligh.
Around them, other refugees
fell like leaves as the soldiers
attacked the helpless targets.
The survivors fled first toward
Lebanon, but they could not
get out that way, and there
they lost contact with Baaligh.
So they made their way
north to the port of Tartous.
There Ahzan used his knowledge
of English and European money
saved from tips to buy passage on
a smuggling boat bound for Cyprus.
It could not get past the patrols,
so it headed farther north to Greece.
The unpredictable autumn weather
batted the small boat back and forth,
storms and fog making a miserable trip.
When they finally reached the shore,
however, the Greek authorities
repelled the refugee boat with
violence, which caused it to sink.
Ahzan made it to the beach safely,
flopping exhausted onto the sand.
In the medical tent, he learned
what that terrible trip had cost.
Lamya had floated on her back
to keep the infant Hasra in the air,
but that caused Lamya to inhale
so much water that she died
shortly after making landfall.
Ahzan sat in the tent, crushed
by his grief. He and Hasra
were the only survivors.
His mother, his wife, and
all their other children died,
leaving him alone with an infant
and no means of supporting her.
He was sobbing into his hands
when a nurse touched his shoulder
and quoted, "So lose not heart,
nor fall into despair, for you will
be superior if you are true in faith."
Ahzan flinched away from the touch.
The civil war wracking Syria had
its roots in religion as much as politics,
evil weeds choking the life from the land.
His parents had been as faithful as anyone,
and where had that gotten them? Dead.
As far as Ahzan was concerned, religion
had killed all his family but one, so it
had no power to comfort him now.
He fell into despair, because
he had nowhere else to go.
* * *
Notes:
Ahzan Laham -- He has caramel skin, brown eyes, and short curly brown hair. He speaks Arabic and English, though he's not fully fluent in English yet. He is 24 years old in 2014.
Ahzan grew up in Damascus, Syria. He got married at 18. His wife Lamya was 16. They were two young people clinging to each other in an increasingly desperate situation, and although their fathers arranged the marriage, they became quite fond of each other. They had two sons (5, 4) and three daughters (3, 2, and Hasra, 6 months) together. Ahzan worked as a porter at an international hotel chain; Lamya worked as a maid; and Ahzan's mother kept the children during the day. So Ahzan managed to learn English tolerably well and collect tips in European cash.
In late 2013, increased fighting in and around Damascus killed several members of his extended family. Then another skirmish collapsed their apartment building, which killed Ahzan's father and most of Lamya's family except for her uncle Baaligh. The survivors fled first toward Lebanon, but they could not get out that way, and they lost contact with Baaligh there. So they made their way north to Tartus. There Ahzan used his knowledge of English and European money saved from tips to buy passage on a smuggling boat bound for Cyprus. It could not get past the patrols, though, so it headed north to Greece. When they reached the shore, however, the Greek authorities repelled the refugee boat with violence, causing it to sink. Ahzan made it to the beach safely, and Hasra also survived. His mother, his wife, and all their other children died. Lamya had floated on her back to keep the infant Hasra in the air, but that caused Lamya to inhale so much water that she died shortly after making landfall.
Because Ahzan was a single father with a young infant, both in poor condition after the harrowing shipwreck, Refugee Services expedited their processing and sent them to America. There they settle in Rutledge, Vermont. Ahzan hangs around the Peace Store because he desperately needs peace, and eventually winds up working there. He has a lot of damage from past trauma, and Hasra is a high-need baby, so he's upset and exhausted much of the time. He loves her deeply, but he struggles to provide the peaceful presence that she needs. Ahzan has a capsule wardrobe of menswear in shades of gray, white, blue, and pink with a set of wool sweaters for cold weather.
Qualities: Good (+2) Existential Intelligence, Good (+2) Father, Good (+2) Porter, Good (+2) Stamina, Good (+2) Survivor
Poor (-2) Traumatic Loss
French and English are used in educated Syrian circles, particularly in Aleppo and Damascus. Of the two, English is more popular.
On 12 June 2012, the UN for the first time officially proclaimed Syria to be in a state of civil war.[30] The conflict began moving into the two largest cities, Damascus and Aleppo. In both cities, peaceful protests – including a general strike by Damascus shopkeepers and a small strike in Aleppo were interpreted as indicating that the historical alliance between the Ba'ath government and the business establishment in the large cities had become weak.[31]
---8<---
Ba'athist Government offensives (October–December 2013)[edit]
Further information: Aleppo offensive (October–December 2013) and Battle of Qalamoun (2013–2014)
The Syrian Army along with its allies, Hezbollah and the al-Abas brigade, launched an offensive on Damascus and Aleppo.
Tartus (Arabic: طَرْطُوس / ALA-LC: Ṭarṭūs; known in the County of Tripoli as Tortosa and also transliterated Tartous) is a city on the Mediterranean coast of Syria. It is the second largest port city in Syria (after Latakia), and the largest city in Tartus Governorate.
Cyprus Asks EU to Prevent Migrant Boat Departures From Syria
Cyprus has asked the European Union to act swiftly to stop boats loaded with migrants from leaving Syria’s port of Tartus, saying the east Mediterranean island nation is saturated and can’t take in any more.
Greece has repeatedly pushed back refugee boats. Sometimes the rickety boats sink, killing most or all of the passengers.
See maps of Syrian cities, refugee escape points, and the Middle East.
See Ahzan's Vermont T-shirt, wool sweaters, blue wool pants, and coral wool pants. This is his Vermont bag.
Hasra Laham -- She has tinted skin, brown eyes, and short curly brown hair. She was born on July 2, 2013 with a sun sign of Cancer. She is 1 year old in 2014. She is the youngest daughter (and only surviving child) of Ahzan and Lamya. Hasra's family came from Damascus. In late 2013, increased fighting in and around the city killed several members of her extended family. The survivors fled, eventually boarding a boat run by smugglers. When they reached the shore, however, the Greek authorities repelled the refugee boat with violence, causing it to sink. Ahzan made it to the beach safely, and Hasra also survived. Her grandmother, her mother, and all her siblings died. Lamya had floated on her back to keep the infant Hasra in the air, but that caused Lamya to inhale so much water that she died shortly after making landfall.
Because Ahzan was a single father with a young infant, both in poor condition after the harrowing shipwreck, Refugee Services expedited their processing and sent them to America. There they settle in Rutledge, Vermont. Now they are struggling to adapt to a whole new life with only each other. Hasra has a layette of pink, white, and turquoise baby clothes.
Qualities: Good (+2) Survivor
Poor (-2) Developmental Trauma
Her developmental trauma began with stressful conditions before birth, precarious supply of food and other survival needs, family fleeing home, and loss of whole family except for father by 6 months. The main symptoms include constant anxiety, hypervigilance, fearful response to unfamiliar or strong stimuli (especially loud noises), frequent and prolonged crying, inconsolability, extreme clinginess, sleep disruptions, and indigestion. Hasra resists pureed food and clings to the bottle. Less obvious early on, but becoming more notable over time, is resistance to Arabic and English, the two languages most heard during the period of high trauma. Other languages without that association, such as French or sign language, may hold more appeal. This makes Hasra a very high-need baby.
On 12 June 2012, the UN for the first time officially proclaimed Syria to be in a state of civil war.[30] The conflict began moving into the two largest cities, Damascus and Aleppo. In both cities, peaceful protests – including a general strike by Damascus shopkeepers and a small strike in Aleppo were interpreted as indicating that the historical alliance between the Ba'ath government and the business establishment in the large cities had become weak.[31]
---8<---
Ba'athist Government offensives (October–December 2013)[edit]
Further information: Aleppo offensive (October–December 2013) and Battle of Qalamoun (2013–2014)
The Syrian Army along with its allies, Hezbollah and the al-Abas brigade, launched an offensive on Damascus and Aleppo.
Tartus (Arabic: طَرْطُوس / ALA-LC: Ṭarṭūs; known in the County of Tripoli as Tortosa and also transliterated Tartous) is a city on the Mediterranean coast of Syria. It is the second largest port city in Syria (after Latakia), and the largest city in Tartus Governorate.
Cyprus Asks EU to Prevent Migrant Boat Departures From Syria
Cyprus has asked the European Union to act swiftly to stop boats loaded with migrants from leaving Syria’s port of Tartus, saying the east Mediterranean island nation is saturated and can’t take in any more.
Greece has repeatedly pushed back refugee boats. Sometimes the rickety boats sink, killing most or all of the passengers.
See maps of Syrian cities, refugee escape points, and the Middle East.
Childhood trauma can disrupt healthy development, causing developmental trauma disorder. This is not the same as PTSD or PDSD, which disrupt an already established personality, but rather a disruption which prevents a healthy personality from growing in the first place. Infant trauma and child trauma are ubiquitous among refugees. Trauma-informed care can help buffer the damage. Work out a treatment plan to handle the symptoms.
Developmental Milestones
Hasra has accomplished almost all of the 0-3 month tasks and some of the 4-6 month tasks, but has shown less ability and willingness to acquire new skills later on. Most of the developmental damage applies to communication and feeding, some to sensory, little to motor milestones. Of the 0-3 month milestones, Hasra has met 5/5 motor, 3/5 sensory, 3/6 communication, 4/4 feeding. Of the 4-6 month milestones, she has met 5/6 motor, 2/6 sensory, 1/6 communication, and 0/4 feeding. Of the 7-9 month milestones, she has met 8/9 motor, 4/7 sensory, 3/8 communication, and 3/6 feeding. Of the 10-12 month milestones, she has met 4/7 motor, 3/3 senory, 2/9 communication, and 0/6 feeding. Notable damage clusters around anxiety, inconsolability, resistance to being put down, reluctance to explore, refusal to stand up, resistance to Arabic and English, and clinging to the bottle instead of solid food.
Developmental Milestones
x = accomplished
/ = impaired
0 = nothing
0-3 Month Milestones
Motor Milestones
x While lying on tummy, pushes up on arms
x While lying on tummy, lifts and holds head up
x Able to move fists from closed to open
x Able to bring hands to mouth
x Moves legs and arms off of surface when excited
Sensory Milestones
x While lying on back, attempts to reach for a toy held above their chest
x While lying on back, visually tracks a moving toy from side to side
x While lying on back, keeps head centered to watch faces or toys
0 Able to calm with rocking, touching, and gentle sounds
/ Enjoys a variety of movements [easily upset by any vigorous motion]
Communication Milestones
0 Quiets or smiles in response to sound or voice
x Turns head towards sound or voice
x Shows interest in faces
x Makes eye contact
/ Cries differently for different needs (e.g. hungry vs. tired) [mostly screams]
x Coos and smiles
Feeding Milestones
x Latches onto nipple or bottle
x Tongue moves forward and back to suck
x Drinks 2 oz. to 6 oz. of liquid per feeding, 6 times per day
x Sucks and swallows well during feeding
4-6 Month Milestones
Motor Milestones
x Uses hands to support self while sitting
x Rolls from back to tummy and tummy to back
0 While standing with support, accepts entire weight with legs [resists being put down]
x Reaches for nearby toys while on tummy
x While lying on back, reaches both hands to play with feet
x While lying on back, transfers a toy from one hand to the other
Sensory Milestones
x Uses both hands to explore toys
0 Generally happy when not hungry or tired
x Brings hands and objects to mouth
0 Able to calm with rocking, touching, and gentle sounds
0 Is not upset by everyday sounds
0 Enjoys a variety of movements
Communication Milestones
/ Reacts to sudden noises or sounds [panicky reaction]
/ Listens and responds when spoken to [can hear, but is inconsolable]
0 Begins to use consonant sounds in babbling, e.g. “da, da, da”
/ Makes different kinds of sounds to express feelings [mostly screaming]
x Notices toys that make sounds
0 Uses babbling to get attention
Feeding Milestones
/ Shows interest in food [bottle only]
/ Opens mouth as spoon approaches [bottle only]
0 Moves pureed food from front of mouth to back
0 Begins to eat cereals and pureed foods – Smooth, pureed food (single ingredient only), like carrots, sweet potato, squash, apples, pears
7-9 Month Milestones
Motor Milestones
x Sits without support
x Sits and reaches for toys without falling
x Moves from tummy or back into sitting
x Starts to move with alternate leg and arm movement e.g. creeping, crawling
x Picks up head and pushes through elbows during Tummy Time
x Turns head to visually track objects while sitting
x Shows more control while rolling and sitting
x Picks up small objects with thumbs and fingers
0 In simple play imitates others
Sensory Milestones
/ Enjoys a variety of movements – bouncing up and down, rocking back and forth [easily upset by any vigorous motion]
x Explores and examines an object using both hands and mouth
/ Turns several pages of a chunky (board) book at once [minimal interest in books]
x Experiments with the amount of force needed to pick up different objects
x Focuses on objects near and far
/ Investigates shapes, sizes, and textures of toys and surroundings [reluctant to explore environment or new objects]
x Observes environment from a variety of positions – while lying on back or tummy, sitting, crawling, and standing with assistance
Communication Milestones
0 Uses increased variety of sounds and syllable combinations in babbling
x Looks at familiar objects and people when named
x Recognizes sound of their name
/ Participates in two-way communication [only with father]
0 Follows some routine commands when paired with gestures
0 Shows recognition of commonly used words [resistant to Arabic & English]
x Simple gestures, e.g. shaking head for “no”
0 Imitates sounds
Feeding Milestones
x In a highchair, holds and drinks from a bottle
0 Begins to eat thicker pureed and mashed table foods
x Enjoys chew toys that can massage sore and swollen gums during teething
0 Stays full longer after eating
x Starts to look and reach for objects, such as, food that is nearby
/ Shows strong reaction to new smells and tastes [easily upset, and wary of new things]
10-12 Month Milestones
Motor Milestones
0 Pulls to stand and cruises along furniture
0 Stands alone and takes several independent steps
/ Moves in and out of various positions to explore environment and get desired toys [changes position to seek toys, but reluctant to explore]
x Maintains balance in sitting when throwing objects
x Claps hands
x Releases objects into a container with a large opening
x Uses thumb and pointer finger to pick up tiny objects
Sensory Milestones
x Enjoys listening to songs
x Explores toys with fingers and mouth
x Crawls to or away from objects baby sees in the distance
Communication Milestones
0 Meaningfully uses “mama” or “dada”
0 Responds to simple directions, e.g. “Come here”
0 Produces long strings of gibberish (jargoning) in social communication
0 Says one or two words
0 Imitates speech sounds
0 Babbling has sounds and rhythms of speech
x Pays attention to where you are looking and pointing
0 Responds to “no”
x Begins using hand movements to communicate wants and needs, e.g. reaches to be picked up
Feeding Milestones
0 Finger feeds self
0 Eating an increasing variety of food
0 Begins to use an open cup
0 Ready to try soft-cooked vegetables, soft fruits, and finger foods (banana slices, cooked pasta)
0 Might be ready to start self feeding with utensils
0 Enjoys a greater variety of smells and tastes
Developmental delays can have various causes and types. Different kinds of therapy may help brain development. Asynchronous development also has diverse causes, including trauma. Meet children where they are.
It is vitally important to distinguish between children who need extra coaching or tools vs. children who need more time and attention. Developmental delays due to trauma often occur because important steps got missed, blocked, or distorted. In order to recover, the child must somehow learn (or relearn) those earlier steps before further progress becomes possible. Pushing such a child to go faster will make matters worse instead of better. Instead, focus on establishing safety and security, and meet the child at their developmental age rather than making demands based on chronological age. Here are trauma-informed care tips for parents and a guide.
High-need babies demand a lot from parents. They benefit from a peaceful presence.
Hasra gets a Vermont onesie and wool sets in pink, white, gray, and turquoise.
* * *
"So lose not heart, nor fall into despair, for you will be superior if you are true in faith."
-- Surah Al-Imran
During Autumn and Spring, the transition, the weather may go crazy in the Mediterranean. This is the time of the year where storms and other weather -- phenomena like Libeccio and Scirocco are the most likely.
Religious turmoil is among the causes of the Syrian civil war.
ng_moonmoth. This poem belongs to the Rutledge thread of the Polychrome Heroics series. It is followed by "Leave Behind Their Shadows," "A Matter of Balance," and "The Basic Source of Peace."WARNING: This poem contains material that may disturb many readers. All hurt, no comfort. Highlight to read the warnings, some of which are spoilers. It includes war-typical violence, traumatic loss, ruins, refugees, separation, human smuggling, violent repulsion of a refugee boat causing it to sink, mass casualties including child deaths, loss of faith, and other mayhem. If these are touchy topics for you, please consider your tastes and headspace before deciding whether this is something you want to read. It introduces new characters, so skipping it would leave a gap; but you could summarize it as "awful refugee past" and pick up with the later poems.
"Fall into Despair"
[Late 2013]
Ahzan Laham had grown up
in Damascus, Syria where
he married Lamya and soon
started a family of his own.
They were two young people
who clung to each other amidst
an increasingly desperate situation
as the civil war heated up, and
although their fathers arranged
the marriage, Ahzan and Lamya
became quite fond of each other.
They had two older sons and
three younger daughters together.
Ahzan worked as a porter
at an international hotel chain;
Lamya worked as a maid; and
Ahzan's mother took care of
the children during the day.
So Ahzan managed to learn
English tolerably well and he
collected tips in European cash.
That autumn, increased fighting
in and around Damascus
killed several members of
Ahzan's extended family.
Then another deadly skirmish
collapsed their apartment building,
which killed Ahzan's father and
most of Lamya's family except
for her favorite uncle Baaligh.
Around them, other refugees
fell like leaves as the soldiers
attacked the helpless targets.
The survivors fled first toward
Lebanon, but they could not
get out that way, and there
they lost contact with Baaligh.
So they made their way
north to the port of Tartous.
There Ahzan used his knowledge
of English and European money
saved from tips to buy passage on
a smuggling boat bound for Cyprus.
It could not get past the patrols,
so it headed farther north to Greece.
The unpredictable autumn weather
batted the small boat back and forth,
storms and fog making a miserable trip.
When they finally reached the shore,
however, the Greek authorities
repelled the refugee boat with
violence, which caused it to sink.
Ahzan made it to the beach safely,
flopping exhausted onto the sand.
In the medical tent, he learned
what that terrible trip had cost.
Lamya had floated on her back
to keep the infant Hasra in the air,
but that caused Lamya to inhale
so much water that she died
shortly after making landfall.
Ahzan sat in the tent, crushed
by his grief. He and Hasra
were the only survivors.
His mother, his wife, and
all their other children died,
leaving him alone with an infant
and no means of supporting her.
He was sobbing into his hands
when a nurse touched his shoulder
and quoted, "So lose not heart,
nor fall into despair, for you will
be superior if you are true in faith."
Ahzan flinched away from the touch.
The civil war wracking Syria had
its roots in religion as much as politics,
evil weeds choking the life from the land.
His parents had been as faithful as anyone,
and where had that gotten them? Dead.
As far as Ahzan was concerned, religion
had killed all his family but one, so it
had no power to comfort him now.
He fell into despair, because
he had nowhere else to go.
* * *
Notes:
Ahzan Laham -- He has caramel skin, brown eyes, and short curly brown hair. He speaks Arabic and English, though he's not fully fluent in English yet. He is 24 years old in 2014.
Ahzan grew up in Damascus, Syria. He got married at 18. His wife Lamya was 16. They were two young people clinging to each other in an increasingly desperate situation, and although their fathers arranged the marriage, they became quite fond of each other. They had two sons (5, 4) and three daughters (3, 2, and Hasra, 6 months) together. Ahzan worked as a porter at an international hotel chain; Lamya worked as a maid; and Ahzan's mother kept the children during the day. So Ahzan managed to learn English tolerably well and collect tips in European cash.
In late 2013, increased fighting in and around Damascus killed several members of his extended family. Then another skirmish collapsed their apartment building, which killed Ahzan's father and most of Lamya's family except for her uncle Baaligh. The survivors fled first toward Lebanon, but they could not get out that way, and they lost contact with Baaligh there. So they made their way north to Tartus. There Ahzan used his knowledge of English and European money saved from tips to buy passage on a smuggling boat bound for Cyprus. It could not get past the patrols, though, so it headed north to Greece. When they reached the shore, however, the Greek authorities repelled the refugee boat with violence, causing it to sink. Ahzan made it to the beach safely, and Hasra also survived. His mother, his wife, and all their other children died. Lamya had floated on her back to keep the infant Hasra in the air, but that caused Lamya to inhale so much water that she died shortly after making landfall.
Because Ahzan was a single father with a young infant, both in poor condition after the harrowing shipwreck, Refugee Services expedited their processing and sent them to America. There they settle in Rutledge, Vermont. Ahzan hangs around the Peace Store because he desperately needs peace, and eventually winds up working there. He has a lot of damage from past trauma, and Hasra is a high-need baby, so he's upset and exhausted much of the time. He loves her deeply, but he struggles to provide the peaceful presence that she needs. Ahzan has a capsule wardrobe of menswear in shades of gray, white, blue, and pink with a set of wool sweaters for cold weather.
Qualities: Good (+2) Existential Intelligence, Good (+2) Father, Good (+2) Porter, Good (+2) Stamina, Good (+2) Survivor
Poor (-2) Traumatic Loss
French and English are used in educated Syrian circles, particularly in Aleppo and Damascus. Of the two, English is more popular.
On 12 June 2012, the UN for the first time officially proclaimed Syria to be in a state of civil war.[30] The conflict began moving into the two largest cities, Damascus and Aleppo. In both cities, peaceful protests – including a general strike by Damascus shopkeepers and a small strike in Aleppo were interpreted as indicating that the historical alliance between the Ba'ath government and the business establishment in the large cities had become weak.[31]
---8<---
Ba'athist Government offensives (October–December 2013)[edit]
Further information: Aleppo offensive (October–December 2013) and Battle of Qalamoun (2013–2014)
The Syrian Army along with its allies, Hezbollah and the al-Abas brigade, launched an offensive on Damascus and Aleppo.
Tartus (Arabic: طَرْطُوس / ALA-LC: Ṭarṭūs; known in the County of Tripoli as Tortosa and also transliterated Tartous) is a city on the Mediterranean coast of Syria. It is the second largest port city in Syria (after Latakia), and the largest city in Tartus Governorate.
Cyprus Asks EU to Prevent Migrant Boat Departures From Syria
Cyprus has asked the European Union to act swiftly to stop boats loaded with migrants from leaving Syria’s port of Tartus, saying the east Mediterranean island nation is saturated and can’t take in any more.
Greece has repeatedly pushed back refugee boats. Sometimes the rickety boats sink, killing most or all of the passengers.
See maps of Syrian cities, refugee escape points, and the Middle East.
See Ahzan's Vermont T-shirt, wool sweaters, blue wool pants, and coral wool pants. This is his Vermont bag.
Hasra Laham -- She has tinted skin, brown eyes, and short curly brown hair. She was born on July 2, 2013 with a sun sign of Cancer. She is 1 year old in 2014. She is the youngest daughter (and only surviving child) of Ahzan and Lamya. Hasra's family came from Damascus. In late 2013, increased fighting in and around the city killed several members of her extended family. The survivors fled, eventually boarding a boat run by smugglers. When they reached the shore, however, the Greek authorities repelled the refugee boat with violence, causing it to sink. Ahzan made it to the beach safely, and Hasra also survived. Her grandmother, her mother, and all her siblings died. Lamya had floated on her back to keep the infant Hasra in the air, but that caused Lamya to inhale so much water that she died shortly after making landfall.
Because Ahzan was a single father with a young infant, both in poor condition after the harrowing shipwreck, Refugee Services expedited their processing and sent them to America. There they settle in Rutledge, Vermont. Now they are struggling to adapt to a whole new life with only each other. Hasra has a layette of pink, white, and turquoise baby clothes.
Qualities: Good (+2) Survivor
Poor (-2) Developmental Trauma
Her developmental trauma began with stressful conditions before birth, precarious supply of food and other survival needs, family fleeing home, and loss of whole family except for father by 6 months. The main symptoms include constant anxiety, hypervigilance, fearful response to unfamiliar or strong stimuli (especially loud noises), frequent and prolonged crying, inconsolability, extreme clinginess, sleep disruptions, and indigestion. Hasra resists pureed food and clings to the bottle. Less obvious early on, but becoming more notable over time, is resistance to Arabic and English, the two languages most heard during the period of high trauma. Other languages without that association, such as French or sign language, may hold more appeal. This makes Hasra a very high-need baby.
On 12 June 2012, the UN for the first time officially proclaimed Syria to be in a state of civil war.[30] The conflict began moving into the two largest cities, Damascus and Aleppo. In both cities, peaceful protests – including a general strike by Damascus shopkeepers and a small strike in Aleppo were interpreted as indicating that the historical alliance between the Ba'ath government and the business establishment in the large cities had become weak.[31]
---8<---
Ba'athist Government offensives (October–December 2013)[edit]
Further information: Aleppo offensive (October–December 2013) and Battle of Qalamoun (2013–2014)
The Syrian Army along with its allies, Hezbollah and the al-Abas brigade, launched an offensive on Damascus and Aleppo.
Tartus (Arabic: طَرْطُوس / ALA-LC: Ṭarṭūs; known in the County of Tripoli as Tortosa and also transliterated Tartous) is a city on the Mediterranean coast of Syria. It is the second largest port city in Syria (after Latakia), and the largest city in Tartus Governorate.
Cyprus Asks EU to Prevent Migrant Boat Departures From Syria
Cyprus has asked the European Union to act swiftly to stop boats loaded with migrants from leaving Syria’s port of Tartus, saying the east Mediterranean island nation is saturated and can’t take in any more.
Greece has repeatedly pushed back refugee boats. Sometimes the rickety boats sink, killing most or all of the passengers.
See maps of Syrian cities, refugee escape points, and the Middle East.
Childhood trauma can disrupt healthy development, causing developmental trauma disorder. This is not the same as PTSD or PDSD, which disrupt an already established personality, but rather a disruption which prevents a healthy personality from growing in the first place. Infant trauma and child trauma are ubiquitous among refugees. Trauma-informed care can help buffer the damage. Work out a treatment plan to handle the symptoms.
Developmental Milestones
Hasra has accomplished almost all of the 0-3 month tasks and some of the 4-6 month tasks, but has shown less ability and willingness to acquire new skills later on. Most of the developmental damage applies to communication and feeding, some to sensory, little to motor milestones. Of the 0-3 month milestones, Hasra has met 5/5 motor, 3/5 sensory, 3/6 communication, 4/4 feeding. Of the 4-6 month milestones, she has met 5/6 motor, 2/6 sensory, 1/6 communication, and 0/4 feeding. Of the 7-9 month milestones, she has met 8/9 motor, 4/7 sensory, 3/8 communication, and 3/6 feeding. Of the 10-12 month milestones, she has met 4/7 motor, 3/3 senory, 2/9 communication, and 0/6 feeding. Notable damage clusters around anxiety, inconsolability, resistance to being put down, reluctance to explore, refusal to stand up, resistance to Arabic and English, and clinging to the bottle instead of solid food.
Developmental Milestones
x = accomplished
/ = impaired
0 = nothing
0-3 Month Milestones
Motor Milestones
x While lying on tummy, pushes up on arms
x While lying on tummy, lifts and holds head up
x Able to move fists from closed to open
x Able to bring hands to mouth
x Moves legs and arms off of surface when excited
Sensory Milestones
x While lying on back, attempts to reach for a toy held above their chest
x While lying on back, visually tracks a moving toy from side to side
x While lying on back, keeps head centered to watch faces or toys
0 Able to calm with rocking, touching, and gentle sounds
/ Enjoys a variety of movements [easily upset by any vigorous motion]
Communication Milestones
0 Quiets or smiles in response to sound or voice
x Turns head towards sound or voice
x Shows interest in faces
x Makes eye contact
/ Cries differently for different needs (e.g. hungry vs. tired) [mostly screams]
x Coos and smiles
Feeding Milestones
x Latches onto nipple or bottle
x Tongue moves forward and back to suck
x Drinks 2 oz. to 6 oz. of liquid per feeding, 6 times per day
x Sucks and swallows well during feeding
4-6 Month Milestones
Motor Milestones
x Uses hands to support self while sitting
x Rolls from back to tummy and tummy to back
0 While standing with support, accepts entire weight with legs [resists being put down]
x Reaches for nearby toys while on tummy
x While lying on back, reaches both hands to play with feet
x While lying on back, transfers a toy from one hand to the other
Sensory Milestones
x Uses both hands to explore toys
0 Generally happy when not hungry or tired
x Brings hands and objects to mouth
0 Able to calm with rocking, touching, and gentle sounds
0 Is not upset by everyday sounds
0 Enjoys a variety of movements
Communication Milestones
/ Reacts to sudden noises or sounds [panicky reaction]
/ Listens and responds when spoken to [can hear, but is inconsolable]
0 Begins to use consonant sounds in babbling, e.g. “da, da, da”
/ Makes different kinds of sounds to express feelings [mostly screaming]
x Notices toys that make sounds
0 Uses babbling to get attention
Feeding Milestones
/ Shows interest in food [bottle only]
/ Opens mouth as spoon approaches [bottle only]
0 Moves pureed food from front of mouth to back
0 Begins to eat cereals and pureed foods – Smooth, pureed food (single ingredient only), like carrots, sweet potato, squash, apples, pears
7-9 Month Milestones
Motor Milestones
x Sits without support
x Sits and reaches for toys without falling
x Moves from tummy or back into sitting
x Starts to move with alternate leg and arm movement e.g. creeping, crawling
x Picks up head and pushes through elbows during Tummy Time
x Turns head to visually track objects while sitting
x Shows more control while rolling and sitting
x Picks up small objects with thumbs and fingers
0 In simple play imitates others
Sensory Milestones
/ Enjoys a variety of movements – bouncing up and down, rocking back and forth [easily upset by any vigorous motion]
x Explores and examines an object using both hands and mouth
/ Turns several pages of a chunky (board) book at once [minimal interest in books]
x Experiments with the amount of force needed to pick up different objects
x Focuses on objects near and far
/ Investigates shapes, sizes, and textures of toys and surroundings [reluctant to explore environment or new objects]
x Observes environment from a variety of positions – while lying on back or tummy, sitting, crawling, and standing with assistance
Communication Milestones
0 Uses increased variety of sounds and syllable combinations in babbling
x Looks at familiar objects and people when named
x Recognizes sound of their name
/ Participates in two-way communication [only with father]
0 Follows some routine commands when paired with gestures
0 Shows recognition of commonly used words [resistant to Arabic & English]
x Simple gestures, e.g. shaking head for “no”
0 Imitates sounds
Feeding Milestones
x In a highchair, holds and drinks from a bottle
0 Begins to eat thicker pureed and mashed table foods
x Enjoys chew toys that can massage sore and swollen gums during teething
0 Stays full longer after eating
x Starts to look and reach for objects, such as, food that is nearby
/ Shows strong reaction to new smells and tastes [easily upset, and wary of new things]
10-12 Month Milestones
Motor Milestones
0 Pulls to stand and cruises along furniture
0 Stands alone and takes several independent steps
/ Moves in and out of various positions to explore environment and get desired toys [changes position to seek toys, but reluctant to explore]
x Maintains balance in sitting when throwing objects
x Claps hands
x Releases objects into a container with a large opening
x Uses thumb and pointer finger to pick up tiny objects
Sensory Milestones
x Enjoys listening to songs
x Explores toys with fingers and mouth
x Crawls to or away from objects baby sees in the distance
Communication Milestones
0 Meaningfully uses “mama” or “dada”
0 Responds to simple directions, e.g. “Come here”
0 Produces long strings of gibberish (jargoning) in social communication
0 Says one or two words
0 Imitates speech sounds
0 Babbling has sounds and rhythms of speech
x Pays attention to where you are looking and pointing
0 Responds to “no”
x Begins using hand movements to communicate wants and needs, e.g. reaches to be picked up
Feeding Milestones
0 Finger feeds self
0 Eating an increasing variety of food
0 Begins to use an open cup
0 Ready to try soft-cooked vegetables, soft fruits, and finger foods (banana slices, cooked pasta)
0 Might be ready to start self feeding with utensils
0 Enjoys a greater variety of smells and tastes
Developmental delays can have various causes and types. Different kinds of therapy may help brain development. Asynchronous development also has diverse causes, including trauma. Meet children where they are.
It is vitally important to distinguish between children who need extra coaching or tools vs. children who need more time and attention. Developmental delays due to trauma often occur because important steps got missed, blocked, or distorted. In order to recover, the child must somehow learn (or relearn) those earlier steps before further progress becomes possible. Pushing such a child to go faster will make matters worse instead of better. Instead, focus on establishing safety and security, and meet the child at their developmental age rather than making demands based on chronological age. Here are trauma-informed care tips for parents and a guide.
High-need babies demand a lot from parents. They benefit from a peaceful presence.
Hasra gets a Vermont onesie and wool sets in pink, white, gray, and turquoise.
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"So lose not heart, nor fall into despair, for you will be superior if you are true in faith."
-- Surah Al-Imran
During Autumn and Spring, the transition, the weather may go crazy in the Mediterranean. This is the time of the year where storms and other weather -- phenomena like Libeccio and Scirocco are the most likely.
Religious turmoil is among the causes of the Syrian civil war.
Re: Thoughts
Date: 2021-11-26 01:12 am (UTC)Part of the fun is playing around with the different varaiables: what's fun for one is not fun for everyone, terrifying people can be very kind in context, your allies may not trust your friends, legitimate athourity is not always objectively 'better' than alternate systems, listen to the locals / listen to the oppressed, sometimes people care very much but can't do what you need [like brain surgery], there's a difference between evil / helpy / lacks social skills...
>>It can make the difference between hope and despair, or success and failure.<<
Isn't there a saying somewhere, to the effect of:
"We all need somebody to worry if we dont come home at night,"?
We all need some sort of safe base to launch from.
Re: Thoughts
Date: 2021-11-26 02:04 am (UTC)Sooth.
>> Isn't there a saying somewhere, to the effect of:
"We all need somebody to worry if we dont come home at night,"?
We all need some sort of safe base to launch from.<<
Also, people will forget what you did, but they will never forget how you made them feel.