Opera Outfits Over 40
Jan. 21st, 2026 06:16 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
ysabetwordsmithA friend asked about shopping for clothes over 40, with an eye toward age-appropriate and fashionable wear, given an opera subscription. That's different from my typical needs, but I'm familiar enough with wrangling clothes to have plenty of ideas ...
The vast majority of my shopping is at thrift stores, where a wide variety of items are available at affordable prices.
I also buy some things from craft shows and street fairs -- good places for tie-dye and ethnic wear. Fairy markets and oddities markets are growing in my locale, and sometimes have striking garments that aren't widely available.
Renaissance faires are ideal for finding clothes with a forgiving fit. Not all of it is ornate -- the rennies need practical things to wear. It is ideal for skirts, various types of dresses, shirts, and trousers. If you like bodices for breast support, you won't find a better selection elsewhere. Very often, one historic item with the rest contemporary looks fine.
Etsy has a lot of excellent crafters, and if you are looking for something specific, try searching (name of thing) +_Etsy. I mostly use it for T-shirts but have found other things there too.
I've found a few items at art galleries and international import shops. This is good if you want a few flashy things.
Some things I modify or make myself. If you like the idea but don't sew, it is sometimes possible to find a tailor who will adjust things, especially something fussy like a dress or a suitcoat.
>> I'd love to come up with a nice, three-to-four piece, three-season capsule wardrobe for that, one that's age-appropriate, made of natural fibres, and looks like I purchased it in this decade, and I have no idea where to look. <<
For inspiration, I recommend checking bloggers who are doing capsule wardrobes. Vivienne Files is the best, with widely varied themes. Searching that and "opera" gets multiple hits, although there is no tag for it.
https://www.theviviennefiles.com/2025/05/building-a-wardrobe-gradually-start-with-art-abstraction-blue-by-georgia-okeeffe.html/
https://www.theviviennefiles.com/2014/05/how-to-get-stress-dressed.html/
https://www.theviviennefiles.com/2022/05/preparing-for-warm-weather-stress-dressing-clusters.html/
Some blogs and articles are age-specific:
https://www.miik.ca/blogs/news/how-to-build-a-capsule-wardrobe-for-women-over-40-50-60
https://www.wardrobeoxygen.com/fashion-advice/capsule-wardrobe/
https://www.fabulousafter40.com/summer-capsule-wardrobe-over-40/
And for opera:
https://www.adriannapapell.com/blogs/inspiration/what-to-wear-to-the-opera
https://40plusstyle.com/what-to-wear-to-the-opera/
The best way to avoid clothes that look dated is to pick things with little or no detail. It's the details that change fastest. Get a simple neckline, cuffs, hems, etc. I would probably go with 1-2 white or cream blouses in different styles, a skirt and/or trousers in black (or your dark neutral), and a simple black dress. If you love blouses, a silk blouse with a vivid print is ideal for opera. If you love dresses, consider a plain one for warm weather and one for cool weather; keep your eyes out for a magnificent one. If it gets frigid where you live, consider a warm sweater of plain black cashmere, angora, or chenille. Here is a 7-piece office wardrobe that would work just as well for opera.
Remember you'll wear these mostly seated, so test them sitting in the fitting room! You don't want something that scrunches your backside or digs into your waist. Stretch fabrics work better than rigid ones for this. If you have solid-band skirts or pants that you love, with a button, consider an extender with an inch or so of elastic, button on one end and hole on the other.
Then add flair. Scarves are available in myriad colors. So are shawls and ruanas. If you like fitted jackets, get a striking one -- brocade, velvet, shot silk, embroidery, that sort of thing. Some folks like open, flowing cardigans. Shorter is better than longer here; a duster will get trapped under your butt when you sit. Opera is also the perfect place for splendid jewelry. Some folks like to emphasize purses or shoes. Whatever type of accessory you love most, get something vivid for opera nights.
Check formalwear shops. They almost always have a "mother of the bride" section meant to flatter middle-aged women. You may even find one with a section for opera or other theatre wear. They often have things that are on sale from last season, or that someone ordered but didn't pick up. They also tend to do alterations. Tell them about your opera love and ask who else in your area carries opera wear.
Watch holiday sales like a hawk. You may have missed the best of this year's pick from Christmas/New Year but it's still worth a look. In late December-early January you will find velvet, brocade, silk, sequins, embroidery, metallic cloth, fine fabrics, and other luxuries. It's a good place to look for a few flashy things to glam up your opera basics. But if you love red or purple, a touch of that works for theatre, so watch for the Valentine's sales.
>> Do you buy them all online, or is there hope of finding something in person? How do you figure out age-appropriate versions of current fashion? <<
I can't shop online for clothes. I'm lucky if I can find things that fit in person. I don't care what is in fashion or considered age-appropriate; I buy what I like that is comfortable to wear. But if I needed to know age-appropriate fashion, then I would look for fashionable people near my age wearing things I liked. For opera, look at what other people wear there. Thinking about "appropriate current fashion" I'd check French, it's hard to go wrong with that.
https://aleksandraolenska.com/how-to-bring-a-touch-of-french-style-and-attitude-into-your-life-over-40/
https://babyboomster.com/dress-french-style-over-50/
https://leoncechenal.com/french-fashion-style-women-over-50/
>> I know where I'd shop for a cheaper, younger version of this kind of thing, but not the nicer, more expensive, increasingly middle-aged version! <<
If you have that kind of budget, look for local tailors or seamstresses who will make something just for you. One that leaps readily to mind is crushed stretch velvet in black (or your dark neutral). It's rarely available in larger sizes or more forgiving styles, but its combination of stretchiness and luxury is unbeatable except perhaps for wool knits. A bit of trim like lace can help hide your less-favorite parts of your body if necessary, and a good tailor can suggest suitable patterns too. Grab a few mix-and-match items, sure, but there's nothing wrong with splurging on a perfect dress that you'll wear a lot.
A trick for dressing up a mostly monochrome capsule wardrobe: make accessory capsules. A scarf, a few pieces of jewelry, a purse or shoes -- make sets in rich colors like ruby, royal blue, emerald, amethyst, gold, or silver. Each will go with all your things, but make them look different. Some examples:
https://www.theviviennefiles.com/2012/06/variations-on-dress-black.html/
https://www.theviviennefiles.com/2015/01/a-black-wardrobe-with-turquoise-coral.html/
https://www.theviviennefiles.com/2015/01/a-black-wardrobe-with-pearl-lace-gold.html/
The vast majority of my shopping is at thrift stores, where a wide variety of items are available at affordable prices.
I also buy some things from craft shows and street fairs -- good places for tie-dye and ethnic wear. Fairy markets and oddities markets are growing in my locale, and sometimes have striking garments that aren't widely available.
Renaissance faires are ideal for finding clothes with a forgiving fit. Not all of it is ornate -- the rennies need practical things to wear. It is ideal for skirts, various types of dresses, shirts, and trousers. If you like bodices for breast support, you won't find a better selection elsewhere. Very often, one historic item with the rest contemporary looks fine.
Etsy has a lot of excellent crafters, and if you are looking for something specific, try searching (name of thing) +_Etsy. I mostly use it for T-shirts but have found other things there too.
I've found a few items at art galleries and international import shops. This is good if you want a few flashy things.
Some things I modify or make myself. If you like the idea but don't sew, it is sometimes possible to find a tailor who will adjust things, especially something fussy like a dress or a suitcoat.
>> I'd love to come up with a nice, three-to-four piece, three-season capsule wardrobe for that, one that's age-appropriate, made of natural fibres, and looks like I purchased it in this decade, and I have no idea where to look. <<
For inspiration, I recommend checking bloggers who are doing capsule wardrobes. Vivienne Files is the best, with widely varied themes. Searching that and "opera" gets multiple hits, although there is no tag for it.
https://www.theviviennefiles.com/2025/05/building-a-wardrobe-gradually-start-with-art-abstraction-blue-by-georgia-okeeffe.html/
https://www.theviviennefiles.com/2014/05/how-to-get-stress-dressed.html/
https://www.theviviennefiles.com/2022/05/preparing-for-warm-weather-stress-dressing-clusters.html/
Some blogs and articles are age-specific:
https://www.miik.ca/blogs/news/how-to-build-a-capsule-wardrobe-for-women-over-40-50-60
https://www.wardrobeoxygen.com/fashion-advice/capsule-wardrobe/
https://www.fabulousafter40.com/summer-capsule-wardrobe-over-40/
And for opera:
https://www.adriannapapell.com/blogs/inspiration/what-to-wear-to-the-opera
https://40plusstyle.com/what-to-wear-to-the-opera/
The best way to avoid clothes that look dated is to pick things with little or no detail. It's the details that change fastest. Get a simple neckline, cuffs, hems, etc. I would probably go with 1-2 white or cream blouses in different styles, a skirt and/or trousers in black (or your dark neutral), and a simple black dress. If you love blouses, a silk blouse with a vivid print is ideal for opera. If you love dresses, consider a plain one for warm weather and one for cool weather; keep your eyes out for a magnificent one. If it gets frigid where you live, consider a warm sweater of plain black cashmere, angora, or chenille. Here is a 7-piece office wardrobe that would work just as well for opera.
Remember you'll wear these mostly seated, so test them sitting in the fitting room! You don't want something that scrunches your backside or digs into your waist. Stretch fabrics work better than rigid ones for this. If you have solid-band skirts or pants that you love, with a button, consider an extender with an inch or so of elastic, button on one end and hole on the other.
Then add flair. Scarves are available in myriad colors. So are shawls and ruanas. If you like fitted jackets, get a striking one -- brocade, velvet, shot silk, embroidery, that sort of thing. Some folks like open, flowing cardigans. Shorter is better than longer here; a duster will get trapped under your butt when you sit. Opera is also the perfect place for splendid jewelry. Some folks like to emphasize purses or shoes. Whatever type of accessory you love most, get something vivid for opera nights.
Check formalwear shops. They almost always have a "mother of the bride" section meant to flatter middle-aged women. You may even find one with a section for opera or other theatre wear. They often have things that are on sale from last season, or that someone ordered but didn't pick up. They also tend to do alterations. Tell them about your opera love and ask who else in your area carries opera wear.
Watch holiday sales like a hawk. You may have missed the best of this year's pick from Christmas/New Year but it's still worth a look. In late December-early January you will find velvet, brocade, silk, sequins, embroidery, metallic cloth, fine fabrics, and other luxuries. It's a good place to look for a few flashy things to glam up your opera basics. But if you love red or purple, a touch of that works for theatre, so watch for the Valentine's sales.
>> Do you buy them all online, or is there hope of finding something in person? How do you figure out age-appropriate versions of current fashion? <<
I can't shop online for clothes. I'm lucky if I can find things that fit in person. I don't care what is in fashion or considered age-appropriate; I buy what I like that is comfortable to wear. But if I needed to know age-appropriate fashion, then I would look for fashionable people near my age wearing things I liked. For opera, look at what other people wear there. Thinking about "appropriate current fashion" I'd check French, it's hard to go wrong with that.
https://aleksandraolenska.com/how-to-bring-a-touch-of-french-style-and-attitude-into-your-life-over-40/
https://babyboomster.com/dress-french-style-over-50/
https://leoncechenal.com/french-fashion-style-women-over-50/
>> I know where I'd shop for a cheaper, younger version of this kind of thing, but not the nicer, more expensive, increasingly middle-aged version! <<
If you have that kind of budget, look for local tailors or seamstresses who will make something just for you. One that leaps readily to mind is crushed stretch velvet in black (or your dark neutral). It's rarely available in larger sizes or more forgiving styles, but its combination of stretchiness and luxury is unbeatable except perhaps for wool knits. A bit of trim like lace can help hide your less-favorite parts of your body if necessary, and a good tailor can suggest suitable patterns too. Grab a few mix-and-match items, sure, but there's nothing wrong with splurging on a perfect dress that you'll wear a lot.
A trick for dressing up a mostly monochrome capsule wardrobe: make accessory capsules. A scarf, a few pieces of jewelry, a purse or shoes -- make sets in rich colors like ruby, royal blue, emerald, amethyst, gold, or silver. Each will go with all your things, but make them look different. Some examples:
https://www.theviviennefiles.com/2012/06/variations-on-dress-black.html/
https://www.theviviennefiles.com/2015/01/a-black-wardrobe-with-turquoise-coral.html/
https://www.theviviennefiles.com/2015/01/a-black-wardrobe-with-pearl-lace-gold.html/
