>>A much less obvious one mostly practiced by linguists: when talking with someone from another culture, park your toes and let them stand where they feel comfortable. Different cultures range from right on top of each other to more than an arm's length away.<<
It's good to have different tools. That one is good for nonverbally testing what the other person's preference is - useful if you are unfamiliar with that culture, unable to speak with the other person, or if you are unsure if someone's personal space bubble has just changed.
In cases where I am in my own culture and familiar with the other [usually closer-up] culture, I could probably put up with the friendly-vs-too-close! dichotomy for awhile, but If I am seeing the person frequently, I will try to figure out how to communicate that I/Americans usually need more space somehow. (I have used mime mixed with one or two words to do this in the past.)
If I were in a closer-up culture, I'd probably put up with the incursions on my space most of the time (and schedule time to decompress), but again, if interacting with the same person regularly (as in, having an ongoing relationship), I might try to mention that occasionally need American-personal-space for a few minutes.
>>Also different things matter in different places, like water in a desert.<<
Different cultures value stuff differently, as do different people. And sometimes the rules fluctuate in ways that are not intuitive looking from the outside. Water may be valued differently in the wet and dry seasons, someone may be more or less willing to talk depending on company or time of day, etc
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dancing_serpent
Re: Liberty
Date: 2024-12-28 04:58 pm (UTC)It's good to have different tools. That one is good for nonverbally testing what the other person's preference is - useful if you are unfamiliar with that culture, unable to speak with the other person, or if you are unsure if someone's personal space bubble has just changed.
In cases where I am in my own culture and familiar with the other [usually closer-up] culture, I could probably put up with the friendly-vs-too-close! dichotomy for awhile, but If I am seeing the person frequently, I will try to figure out how to communicate that I/Americans usually need more space somehow. (I have used mime mixed with one or two words to do this in the past.)
If I were in a closer-up culture, I'd probably put up with the incursions on my space most of the time (and schedule time to decompress), but again, if interacting with the same person regularly (as in, having an ongoing relationship), I might try to mention that occasionally need American-personal-space for a few minutes.
>>Also different things matter in different places, like water in a desert.<<
Different cultures value stuff differently, as do different people. And sometimes the rules fluctuate in ways that are not intuitive looking from the outside. Water may be valued differently in the wet and dry seasons, someone may be more or less willing to talk depending on company or time of day, etc