>>Key point: not having to interact with the person. Much damage is done when incompatible people can't avoid each other, all the more so if one has power over the other.<<
Amen to that.
The two cases, the people involved might be in the same building or (large) room, but wouldn't be required to interact or be alone with each other.
One case was a joke that...really wasn't (and the languague barrier did not help).
The other - I'm pretty sure it was a bad case of incompatible needs/personalities (possibly mixed with a bit of a culture clash).
>>I consider it a very risky bottleneck any time there's only one person to teach a class or handle certain paperwork.<<
One of the advantages of having several volunteers is we could switch off depending on resources, compatible personalities, individual knowledge / experience etc.
Plus we didn't have to derail the whole class just because one person needed help figuring out his electric bill...
>>Ideally, people in helping professions need extra education in body language to catch things like this, and business parameters that direct them to back off instead of bullying people.<<
Complicating this, some cultures, demographics and people have very subtle body language.
I just had a discussion with someone today, and one of the chief complaints was that the other person cannot tell when my temper is fraying. (To me, repeating "Don't do X" twice is a clear warning.)
>>Sadly all the references I've seen are about how to force people to give up information they don't want to. Nobody seems to think it advisable to make interviews culturally appropriate or respectful. And then they wonder why people "don't want help."<<
I only recognized the pattern after running into it several times myself (and admittedly, not always handling it gracefully).
Usually [and especially in cross-cultural situations] if you don't get the expected response 1x, 2x, it's a good idea to step back and check what's going on.
>>... and avoid that person, because that shit is not okay. If it's a demand, it's not fun, it's work; like an office "party."<<
Two of the three 'serious issues' I recall involved someone using that tone. And no, they did not get what they wanted in the end.
People get to choose who they're comfortable working with, and people get to choose how they are or are not going to pray.
One can have Opinions, but one does not get to enforce those Opinions on others.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
dancing_serpent
Re: Thoughts
Date: 2021-11-26 05:18 am (UTC)Amen to that.
The two cases, the people involved might be in the same building or (large) room, but wouldn't be required to interact or be alone with each other.
One case was a joke that...really wasn't (and the languague barrier did not help).
The other - I'm pretty sure it was a bad case of incompatible needs/personalities (possibly mixed with a bit of a culture clash).
>>I consider it a very risky bottleneck any time there's only one person to teach a class or handle certain paperwork.<<
One of the advantages of having several volunteers is we could switch off depending on resources, compatible personalities, individual knowledge / experience etc.
Plus we didn't have to derail the whole class just because one person needed help figuring out his electric bill...
>>Ideally, people in helping professions need extra education in body language to catch things like this, and business parameters that direct them to back off instead of bullying people.<<
Complicating this, some cultures, demographics and people have very subtle body language.
I just had a discussion with someone today, and one of the chief complaints was that the other person cannot tell when my temper is fraying. (To me, repeating "Don't do X" twice is a clear warning.)
>>Sadly all the references I've seen are about how to force people to give up information they don't want to. Nobody seems to think it advisable to make interviews culturally appropriate or respectful. And then they wonder why people "don't want help."<<
I only recognized the pattern after running into it several times myself (and admittedly, not always handling it gracefully).
Usually [and especially in cross-cultural situations] if you don't get the expected response 1x, 2x, it's a good idea to step back and check what's going on.
>>... and avoid that person, because that shit is not okay. If it's a demand, it's not fun, it's work; like an office "party."<<
Two of the three 'serious issues' I recall involved someone using that tone. And no, they did not get what they wanted in the end.
People get to choose who they're comfortable working with, and people get to choose how they are or are not going to pray.
One can have Opinions, but one does not get to enforce those Opinions on others.