Hard Things

[ysabetwordsmith]

Life is full of things which are hard or tedious or otherwise unpleasant that need doing anyhow. They help make the world go 'round, they improve skills, and they boost your sense of self-respect. But doing them still kinda sucks. It's all the more difficult to do those things when nobody appreciates it. Happily, blogging allows us to share our accomplishments and pat each other on the back.

What are some of the hard things you've done recently? What are some hard things you haven't gotten to yet, but need to do?

Comments

Re: Thoughts

[ysabetwordsmith]

>> It happened on December 14:...I think it's been about a month now? <<

About three weeks. That's useful to know. This is a good time to think about your progress. (You don't have answer any of this out loud, just to yourself.) How much of a mess were you the first week? Do you feel better, the same, or worse now? After a few weeks, most people will still have some rough days but should see clear progress compared to the immediate aftermath of the trauma. What still needs work? Do you have ideas for fixing it yourself or do you want help with it?

By the way, watch out for the one-month anniversary, that's hard on most folks. Try to have someone you trust with you on Jan. 14, and don't push yourself too hard that day.

>> And there are still days where I just...don't want to do anything except sit and refresh DW looking for fiction <<

Okay, some thoughts here:

1) If there are occasional days when you have no energy, that's okay. Everyone does sometimes, and trauma survivors do more than average. It might help you to mark them on a calendar so that you can tell whether they are getting farther apart, staying the same distance, or closer. If the bad days are clustering a lot, that's not so good.

2) When you feel like crap, self-soothing techniques such as comfort reading are a very prudent use of your time. If you were bleeding, you'd put a bandage on it, right? This is like that, only for your feelings. If all you can do that day is plug the leak, well, at least you've stopped it from getting worse. Times I've been on deadline when I was sick, sometimes I would write a paragraph of article, read something sweet, write another paragraph, and repeat.

3) Here are some tips from depressed people on how to get out of bed when you have no energy. They generalize well to traumatic lethargy too -- especially "be depressed outside."

>> Which I'm all caught up on the current series...I keep forgetting that I can read back through LIFC because I'm not there.<<

Yes, LIFC is extremely popular as comfort reading.

>> Most of these I remember, but I'm glad I have them in one place again, plus the support group deal,<<

Yay! Speaking of things in one place, you might want to make (or have someone make for you) an emotional first aid kit.

>> and I didn't really think about the scrap booking thing, so than,k you for that. :) <<

You're welcome. It appears in a few references for trauma survivors, but not a lot yet. Over in Terramagne it's a standard technique that is widely recommended after a trauma, often under a heading like "Choose a narrative technique that resonates with you." If this appeals and you need a hand with it, I can help you find ideas. A drawback of scrapbooking is that most references are visual, until you get into the embellishments aisle at a store.

>> I'm just awake from a nap, so I'll most likely pick through the rest of this later when I'm not hungry enough for my stomach to eat itself. LOL <<

Okay, great. That reminds me, here's a list of self-care steps for when you feel awful. Eating regularly is on there.

>> Thank you again, very much. :) <<

*hugs offered* I'm glad I could help. Trauma sucks, but knowledge makes it suck a little less.