ysabetwordsmith: (paladins)
[personal profile] ysabetwordsmith
This is today's freebie, inspired by a prompt from [personal profile] dialecticdreamer. It belongs to the series Path of the Paladins.


"Dreams of Ink"
-- a decastich


It is a dream that does not fade,
When dawn's light overtakes the glade,
Of thorns and blossoms, berries too,
All decked about in morning dew.
Already he's bestowed his heart,
And not upon the God of Art,
So why this vision that won't go?
It's nettlesome, it breaks the flow,
And Johan knows not what to think.
He sleeps again, and dreams of ink.

* * * 

Notes:

A decastich is any poem of exactly 10 lines.  It is often free verse, but it can use rhyme/meter, as this one does.


Lovely

Date: 2015-05-19 08:01 pm (UTC)
dialecticdreamer: My work (Default)
From: [personal profile] dialecticdreamer
I think it captures the lure of ink for those who feel it, and it's gorgeous imagery besides.

Nettlesome.

8-)

Re: Lovely

Date: 2015-05-19 08:17 pm (UTC)
dialecticdreamer: My work (Default)
From: [personal profile] dialecticdreamer
It's definitely needing the buildup if the ink's as important to the story arc as your notes implied!

I love how you took the /simplest/ form, almost free verse, and made it more structured, more decorated... flourishes and swirls, rather than rigid restrictions.

(no subject)

Date: 2015-05-21 04:22 am (UTC)
thnidu: a dandelion plant, the symbol of filk (filk)
From: [personal profile] thnidu
Lovely, although I will have to reread some of Path of the Paladins to recover the context.

Drop the second T. These lines (στίχοι) may be sown, but they are not sewn.

Re: Thank you!

Date: 2015-05-21 11:00 pm (UTC)
thnidu: my familiar. "Beanie Baby" -type dragon, red with white wings (Default)
From: [personal profile] thnidu
Sorry - my phrasing /was/ brusque, wasn't it? I don't remember what the spelling was in your link that I followed. But I knew "hemistich", and I know you're sharp with languages and poetic forms, so I thought you'd like to know.

*OFF-TOPIC ALERT*

Date: 2015-05-20 05:57 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] msstacy13.livejournal.com
I decided to change my war correspondent's newspaper to a fictional one.
I'm leaning toward the Omaha Daily News,
but I thought people might have fun suggesting possible combinations of merged papers...

http://msstacy13.livejournal.com/3633292.html

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ysabetwordsmith: Cartoon of me in Wordsmith persona (Default)
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