Poem: "A Demon There"

[ysabetwordsmith]

This poem came out of the November 4, 2014 Poetry Fishbowl.  It was inspired by prompts from janetmiles and alexseanchai.  It also fills the "memories" square in my 9-29-14 card for the origfic_bingo  fest.  This poem has been sponsored by janetmiles.  It belongs to the series One God's Story of Mid-Life Crisis.


"A Demon There"

 

Trobby stares at the murky glass
and the fluid that sloshes inside it.
There is no demon within this  bottle.

That doesn't make it any less dangerous.

"Why do you always stare at the bottles
like that?" asks Prell the minstrel.

"There's a demon there," Trobby explains,
"sometimes."  The wine is empty
of everything but alcohol,
and that's the issue, really.

Trobby's head is full of hassles and bad memories;
the wine makes them stop bothering him
for a while ... but it doesn't make them go away.

"You mean a real demon," Prell says nervously,
"not just people talking about vices."

"Oh yes.  I've seen one," Trobby says.

"I wonder if there are poppy demons too," Prell says,
her voice thickening with her own memories.

Prell's life isn't so different from Trobby's,
just the means, not the end -- his parents
were the town drunks, her father
poisoned himself with poppy.

"There are poppy demons," said Shaeth.
"I have spoken of them with Abredin the Herb Goddess.
It may be that we can find some way to keep them ...
more contained than they have been.
If I am going to be the God of Drunks,
I don't want demons devouring my followers."

"Am I, though?  Really?" Prell said.

Shaeth pulled her close and ruffled her hair.
"You come to my temple.  You play for my drunks,"
he said.  "You are mine if you want to be."

But if a poppy demon had taken her father,
it was a hazard for Prell as well,
the same way that any kind of booze
was heaven and hell for Trobby.

He might be a priest of Shaeth now,
but he was still a drunk, and
sometimes it was still a problem.

Trobby pushed the bottle away.
"Not thirsty," he said.

It was a struggle, like walking a rope bridge,
but today he was winning.

* * *

Notes:

"But when alcohol comes in, start running. Because there's a demon there, and it goes back to her childhood."
-- David Gest

Substance abuse is a negative coping skill that can impact memory.  Reducing or giving up the preferred substance may require mourning its loss.  There are better coping skills for replacing it.  Trobby doesn't want to give up alcohol altogether, but does want to push down his level of drinking to where it won't wreck the new life he's building.

Substance abuse affects the whole family.  Children of alcoholics or drug addicts may have negative impacts continuing into adulthood.  Follow the steps to recover from addictive family dynamics.

Comments

Trobby

[dialecticdreamer]

Wow, I feel for him. Well done, treating the situation gently but honestly.

Re: Trobby

[ysabetwordsmith]

Yay! I'm glad this came through.

One thing I wanted to do with this series was explore options for people who don't want to, or can't, completely remove mind-altering substances from their lives. They get NO support. All the materials are "you MUST quit everything forever." That just doesn't work for some people, leaving them with no options for improving anything.

Well, that's what Shaeth is for. He's the God of Drunks. He picks up the people nobody else wants, and takes care of them as best he can. And that works for them, in a weird sort of way.

[janetmiles.livejournal.com]

I hope Trobby continues to do well, and I like Shaeth's "you're mine if you want to be." Well done, that deity.

Thank you!

[ysabetwordsmith.livejournal.com]

>> I hope Trobby continues to do well, <<

He is making progress. Some days are harder than others, but he's got the beginning of a functional support network now. That makes a difference.

>> and I like Shaeth's "you're mine if you want to be." Well done, that deity. <<

Yay! I'm glad that worked for you. He's learning how to define his sphere of influence.

Re: Thank you!

[pinkrangerv]

'If you want to be' is how gods SHOULD be, too. The pushy ones do not get my respect or worship.

Re: Thank you!

[ysabetwordsmith]

>> 'If you want to be' is how gods SHOULD be, too. <<

I agree.

>> The pushy ones do not get my respect or worship.<<

I tend to give them a boot to the rear, myself.

[labelleizzy.livejournal.com]

yes.

[pinkrangerv]

I like this series! Trobby is much stronger than he thinks he is.

Yay!

[ysabetwordsmith]

I think he is too.

Re: Yay!

[pinkrangerv]

Also, your poems inspired me--I'm going to make a memory blanket! I can knit one row for each task I do. That way I can not just remember what I've done, I have something to remind me that I *did* it. Thank you for the inspiration!

Re: Yay!

[ysabetwordsmith]

That is an AWESOME idea. I haven't heard of using a box-bottom blanket that way but it should work great, especially if you use yarns that remind you of the work you did.

Re: Yay!

[pinkrangerv]

I'm going to use a spiral blanket pattern, actually. I want to make a decorative blanket--that way it'll be something I can hang up and look at for myself.

Re: Yay!

[ysabetwordsmith]

That works. So would free knitting or free crochet where each piece becomes its own whimsical little thing, and then you just splice on the next one.

Re: Yay!

[pinkrangerv]

Oooh, that's a very good point. Maybe for the next blanket, though--this starting one will be nice and simple. :)

Re: Yay!

[ysabetwordsmith]

Yes, it makes sense to keep the first one simple, then expand on the next one.

Re: Yay!

[pinkrangerv]

I like the spiral pattern, too. Life is a spiral. :)