That's why Rule #1 for this technique is that both answers have to be acceptable, although not necessarily of equal preference. You don't have to thrill everyone, just find something both people can live with.
I was weird, as a kid, in that I considered time out an attractive option. Getting away from people bugging me was frequently a high priority for me. It baffled the fuck out of people that I would gleefully bail out of certain conflicts at the point of, "You can do as I say, or go sit on the bench." Problem solved! To this day, I would usually rather give up an item or activity, than capitulate in a way that makes me think less of myself, or continue having contact with people who are driving me up a wall. It's kind of annoying to see the positive discipline pages argue that time out is not an option that kids find acceptable. Time in would've driven me bugfuck, in ways hazardous to me and anyone in the blast radius. Time out I'm cool with. It's one of my go-to coping methods. I've just gotten better, over time, at figuring out and articulating what caused my personality to throw a rod, and how to work through it later.
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dancing_serpent
Re: Oh, my, again!
Date: 2014-08-13 08:25 pm (UTC)I was weird, as a kid, in that I considered time out an attractive option. Getting away from people bugging me was frequently a high priority for me. It baffled the fuck out of people that I would gleefully bail out of certain conflicts at the point of, "You can do as I say, or go sit on the bench." Problem solved! To this day, I would usually rather give up an item or activity, than capitulate in a way that makes me think less of myself, or continue having contact with people who are driving me up a wall. It's kind of annoying to see the positive discipline pages argue that time out is not an option that kids find acceptable. Time in would've driven me bugfuck, in ways hazardous to me and anyone in the blast radius. Time out I'm cool with. It's one of my go-to coping methods. I've just gotten better, over time, at figuring out and articulating what caused my personality to throw a rod, and how to work through it later.