>>Although you know what I hardly ever see is acefolk who like sex. It's not what attracts us to people but orgasms are orgasms and lack of attraction doesn't mean lack of drive or partners. <<
Yeah, asexuality is typically defined by lack of sexual attraction to a partner. I also include people who have an aesthetic awareness of what sexiness is, but feel little or no compulsion to act on it the way sexuals do. It doesn't necessarily mean that they dislike orgasms; some do, some don't. Conversely, if someone is romantic asexual and likes orgasms, they might decide to have -- and even enjoy -- orgasms with their romantic partner, despite having no sexual attraction. Not to mention all the acefolk who copulate because they desire offspring rather than orgasms.
>> Shiv is... almost this? But he's about the only one in media despite this being how half the ace people I know IRL are. <<
Shiv is an odd cat. He can have orgasms. He just dislikes them; they feel bad to him. He wishes his dick would leave him alone and never demand that kind of attention. He is still trying to figure out his orientation(s) and for now, acespec is one he feels semi-okay about flagging, whereas the truer ones -- traumatagender, traumatasexual -- he shies away from. But the fact that he chose to have sex on several unsatisfying occasions leaves him wondering if he's "really" ace. I think anyone who wishes his dick would leave him alone is as ace as it gets, but Shiv doesn't have decades of gender study under his belt.
His experience of powergasm is very much like a souped-up version of how orgasm feels to most people. But his orgasms do not feel at all like a smaller version of that. Shiv feels about powergasms approximately how most people feel about orgasms: that was awesome, let's do it again! Which is complicated by his general standoffishness, but he has managed.
For a totally different example, consider "Like Cherries Harmonizing Pussycats." Tim the Tentacle Monster is an alien, and does not understand human sexuality, but is in interested in what might be described as nonerotic sensual petting that involves human sex parts.
Re: I know last month was Pride month, but still...
Date: 2020-07-08 02:58 am (UTC)Yeah, asexuality is typically defined by lack of sexual attraction to a partner. I also include people who have an aesthetic awareness of what sexiness is, but feel little or no compulsion to act on it the way sexuals do. It doesn't necessarily mean that they dislike orgasms; some do, some don't. Conversely, if someone is romantic asexual and likes orgasms, they might decide to have -- and even enjoy -- orgasms with their romantic partner, despite having no sexual attraction. Not to mention all the acefolk who copulate because they desire offspring rather than orgasms.
>> Shiv is... almost this? But he's about the only one in media despite this being how half the ace people I know IRL are. <<
Shiv is an odd cat. He can have orgasms. He just dislikes them; they feel bad to him. He wishes his dick would leave him alone and never demand that kind of attention. He is still trying to figure out his orientation(s) and for now, acespec is one he feels semi-okay about flagging, whereas the truer ones -- traumatagender, traumatasexual -- he shies away from. But the fact that he chose to have sex on several unsatisfying occasions leaves him wondering if he's "really" ace. I think anyone who wishes his dick would leave him alone is as ace as it gets, but Shiv doesn't have decades of gender study under his belt.
His experience of powergasm is very much like a souped-up version of how orgasm feels to most people. But his orgasms do not feel at all like a smaller version of that. Shiv feels about powergasms approximately how most people feel about orgasms: that was awesome, let's do it again! Which is complicated by his general standoffishness, but he has managed.
For a totally different example, consider "Like Cherries Harmonizing Pussycats." Tim the Tentacle Monster is an alien, and does not understand human sexuality, but is in interested in what might be described as nonerotic sensual petting that involves human sex parts.