>> people who politely bring up other perspectives/offer kind alternatives rather than people who have a simple 'my way or the highway' rage <<
In my observation, two of the most common causes are:
1) The person grew up in a household where hostile communication was the norm, and doesn't actually know how to do those other things.
2) The person knows how to communicate politely, but it is ineffective, at least in the current context. So they move on to other methods in hopes of solving a problem. If politeness is prevailingly ineffective, eventually that wears down the tendency to waste time and energy doing something that doesn't work.
>> or snap 'do the research' and scorn those who ask how to 'do the research'. <<
"Do the research" is almost always a response from folks who are constantly nagged to educate others. Usually it's someone in a disadvantaged position -- women, black people, the disabled, etc. They tend to classify providing a starting point along with all the other educating they sick of doing. It's abrasive, but it's perfectly understandable.
It also doesn't solve any problems, other than sometimes minimizing the amount of time and energy wasted on other people. When you refuse to give people even a starting point, you reduce the potential that they will ever know what you actually want or need -- and raise the potential that they'll get wrong information from sources you know are bad but they don't.
People wonder where all the modern rage comes from -- road rage, going postal, teenagers falling in with terrorists -- and it's basically a flow problem. Anger is the emotion that signals when needs are blocked from being met. If that happens routinely then it turns into rage. Eventually it stops being rational, because rationality is a forebrain thing and too much anger literally flips switches in the brain that make it inaccessible. So a society that habitually prevents people from meeting their needs and doesn't care about that will build up more and more rage in the population. Then all it needs is a spark. Depending on how much fuel is lying around, the result can be anything from a riot to a revolution.
This might be considered a problem. However, it's also a necessary safety catch. Rage is for changing situations that can't be fixed by lesser means. But when you see it -- especially when you see a lot of it -- that's a warning sign of serious trouble.
>>There's plenty I can't do, but my start was to reduce my general buying, support local events where I had interest, buy local and in-store where I can and donate what's serviceable and unneeded directly where I can. <<
Thoughts
Date: 2018-10-12 05:31 pm (UTC)In my observation, two of the most common causes are:
1) The person grew up in a household where hostile communication was the norm, and doesn't actually know how to do those other things.
2) The person knows how to communicate politely, but it is ineffective, at least in the current context. So they move on to other methods in hopes of solving a problem. If politeness is prevailingly ineffective, eventually that wears down the tendency to waste time and energy doing something that doesn't work.
>> or snap 'do the research' and scorn those who ask how to 'do the research'. <<
"Do the research" is almost always a response from folks who are constantly nagged to educate others. Usually it's someone in a disadvantaged position -- women, black people, the disabled, etc. They tend to classify providing a starting point along with all the other educating they sick of doing. It's abrasive, but it's perfectly understandable.
It also doesn't solve any problems, other than sometimes minimizing the amount of time and energy wasted on other people. When you refuse to give people even a starting point, you reduce the potential that they will ever know what you actually want or need -- and raise the potential that they'll get wrong information from sources you know are bad but they don't.
People wonder where all the modern rage comes from -- road rage, going postal, teenagers falling in with terrorists -- and it's basically a flow problem. Anger is the emotion that signals when needs are blocked from being met. If that happens routinely then it turns into rage. Eventually it stops being rational, because rationality is a forebrain thing and too much anger literally flips switches in the brain that make it inaccessible. So a society that habitually prevents people from meeting their needs and doesn't care about that will build up more and more rage in the population. Then all it needs is a spark. Depending on how much fuel is lying around, the result can be anything from a riot to a revolution.
This might be considered a problem. However, it's also a necessary safety catch. Rage is for changing situations that can't be fixed by lesser means. But when you see it -- especially when you see a lot of it -- that's a warning sign of serious trouble.
>>There's plenty I can't do, but my start was to reduce my general buying, support local events where I had interest, buy local and in-store where I can and donate what's serviceable and unneeded directly where I can. <<
That's a great approach.