ysabetwordsmith: Damask smiling over their shoulder (polychrome)
[personal profile] ysabetwordsmith
This poem was written outside the regular prompt calls. It fills the "chocolate" square of my 4-1-17 card for the Month of Rainbows bingo fest. It has been sponsored by [personal profile] bairnsidhe. This poem belongs to the Mallory thread of the Polychrome Heroics series.

"Reasons Not to Hurl the Planet into the Sun"

On BlackSheep, there is a virtual bulletin board
full of reasons not to hurl the planet into the sun,
and a chat pasture for discussing the implications.

Cracker Barrel is making giant s'mores with
ice cream and chocolate sauce in the kitchen.
ZOMFG this is the best dessert ever!
My tongue had multiple orgasms.

-- IronGoddess

BlueDuchess: So what's this
about s'mores in the kitchen?
I've seen people try it before,
but the results are not great.

IronGoddess: These results are EPIC.

Dangerous_dB: Sold!
Thanks for the tip.

Dangerous_dB has left the pasture.

TinAccipiter: I'm not even in
North America. I hate you all.

IronGoddess: So make some plans.
The summer menu runs through August.

Craftswoman1438: This lesbian forgives
Cracker Barrel for previous offenses against
the queer community. Because CHOCOLATE.

IronGoddess: I hereby propose
a one-month moratorium on
robbing Cracker Barrels by
participating supervillains.

BlueDuchess: Even the ones
located in Rabid City?

IronGoddess: In theory, yes.
In practice, we all know that
the new party town is getting
hammered for good reason.
But those of us on here can
still refrain, or at least wait a bit.

Craftswoman1438: I second the motion.

TinAccipiter: Motion carried. I'll go
post this to the No-Hit List. Then
I'm off to plan a trip up north!

Craftswoman1438: Hey, look me up
when you get here. We have garage space
and lots of women who love chocolate.

TinAccipiter: I'm looking forward
to it. See you then.

TinAccipiter has left the pasture.

IronGoddess: My work here
is done. Mwahahahah!

Mallory logs off of BlackSheep,
then stretches hard enough
to make her back pop.

"Dare I ask what you've been up to?"
Heron drawls, wiping a smudge
of chocolate from her chin.

"Nothing heinous," she assures him.
"I've just been spreading the love
of s'mores. We've decided that
Cracker Barrel deserves a month
free of supervillainy for epic dessert."

Heron chuckles and hugs her close.
"You are adorable," he says.

* * *


Cacophony (Rhonda Tittensor) -- She has fair skin, hazel eyes, and long wavy chestnut hair. She came from a conservative religious family but no longer has any contact with them due to childhood mistreatment. As a mercenary, Cacophony does far more than fighting; she also does sabotage, distraction, manipulation, and other supervillain tasks. She is quite popular at supervillain events as an announcer, because she can pitch her voice to be heard without needing to shout. On BlackSheep she is Dangerous_dB.
Origin: Her school was stuffy and conservative, with teachers who rarely called on girls. Her parents expected her to be seen and not heard. When Rhonda was thirteen, the school locked her in an oubliette for making too much noise. And then forgot about her over the weekend. Midmorning Monday, her superpowers manifested. She blasted the oubliette open, pulverized the office and everyone in it, wrecked about a quarter of the school building, and caused numerous other injuries. Dozens of people were left with permanent hearing damage. Devastated by the scene, she ran away.
Months later, Kraken found Rhonda and took her in. When they realized what had triggered her traumatic manifestation, they went back and leveled the rest of the school (while it was empty), broke the arms and legs of the teacher who locked her up, and set family services on her parents. But it took years for her to overcome the experience well enough to build a new life.
Uniform: Kraken uniform of dexflan and capery; the jumpsuit is sensibly designed with sleek fit, plenty of pockets and fasteners for equipment. It provides Expert (+4) Camouflage to a designated user, but if worn by anyone else, turns garish neon colors. The utility belt contains a multitude of small gizmos and other tools.
Qualities: Good (+2) Assertive, Good (+2) Debate, Good (+2) Feminist, Good (+2) Mercenary, Good (+2) Tall
Poor (-2) Keeping Quiet
Powers: Master (+6) Supernatural Voice
Her metapower can be used for Deafening Shout, Fearful Scream, Heartbreaking Song, Hypnotic Speech, Infrasonic Sound, Joyful Noise, Mimicry, Penetrating Voice, Siren Song, Sonic Blast, Soporific Lullaby, Ultrasonic Sound, Ventriloquism, and various other effects.
Limitation: Many of the applications require the listener to be able to hear, so only those with purely physical effects such as Sonic Blast are effective against deaf people. Impaired hearing means the power works at a downshift on that person. Ordinary soundproofing cannot stop her voice, and gizmotronic soundproofing operates at a downshift. Super-gizmotronic soundproofing functions normally and may be resolved by a conflict roll.
Motivation: To be heard.

Here is a guide to dangerous decibels.

Socket -- She is a high school graduate with an excellent trade school education as a mechanic. Fortressa enticed her out of a dead-end job at a lube joint to come lead the Pit Group maintaining Fortressa's power-armor. Socket is short and curvy with electric blue hair and gray eyes. She is a lesbian with a strong competence kink on mechanical matters, and she soon fell in love with Fortressa. Given that Fortressa has sworn off love, Socket remains silent about this, merely staying close at hand to do whatever Fortressa needs to make her happier. Her BlackSheep handle is Craftswoman1438.
Qualities: Master (+6) Gizmologist, Expert (+4) Boundary Awareness, Good (+2) Emotional Intelligence, Good (+2) Flexible, Good (+2) Loyal, Good (+2) Spatial Intelligence
Poor (-2) Crush on Fortressa

Camberhawk (Kennedy O'Clere) -- She has fair skin, brown eyes, and long straight brown hair. She is an only child raised by decent but workaholic parents. Kennedy speaks English, Japanese, and Spanish fluently; she is trying to learn Brazilian Portuguese. She is susceptible to authority and has a hard time standing up for herself. Her BlackSheep handle is TinAccipiter.
Origin: Kennedy used to work for the Vanguardian, until Kraken operatives attacked the company plane she was in. Sucked out through a hole in the fuselage, she almost died, but was caught by a hawkman. Kennedy decided not to return, and eventually built herself a set of gizmotronic wings.
Uniform: Dark brown dexflan flight suit with brown-and-white gizmotronic wings.
Qualities: Expert (+4) Gizmology, Expert (+4) Logical-Mathematical Intelligence, Good (+2) Birdwatching, Good (+2) Strength, Good (+2) Teamwork
Poor (-2) Suggestible
Powers: None. She has a set of Expert (+4) Gizmotronic Wings. The harness includes thrusters for lift. She can glide and steer with the wings, but not flap them enough for actual flying with the wings alone.
Motivation: To be pleasing.

Midnight Blitz (Germaine Hilligoss)
-- She has bisque skin, midnight blue eyes, and long straight platinum blonde hair usually pinned up in a bun. Her heritage is almost pure German. She loves codes and computer languages -- making them, breaking them, playing with them, everything. She also loves puzzles in the same style. Germaine is beautiful enough that guys constantly hit on her, and she hates it, because most of them are jerks. It makes her think twice before going to bars, malls, or other places where single guys hang out.
Midnight Blitz is a supervillain from Rapid City, a hacker. She has tangled with Protean. She is one of the first soups to move out of Rapid City due to its increasing bigotry. On the way out, she defaces the signs to say Rabid City -- and has since made a hobby of doing the same to all the municipal websites. It is driving the police bugfuck, and they can't do anything about it because she doesn't live there anymore, so they have no idea how to find her. Her BlackSheep handle is BlueDuchess.
Origin: Her mother obsessed over having a smart daughter, and constantly played music, videos, brain-training tapes, etc. while she was growing up -- some of them very dodgy quality. It worked. But eventually she realized that her mother was essentially experimenting on her, and now they are estranged.
Uniform: On duty, she wears a midnight-blue dexflan unitard streaked with brighter shades of blue, with matching midnight krevel knee boots and elbow gloves, and a face mask mottled in shades of blue. Off duty, she wears elegant women's clothes, often in black, white, grays, and blues.
Qualities: Expert (+4) Hacker, Good (+2) Cryptanalyst, Good (+2) Fast, Good (+2) Networking with People
Poor (-2) Jerk Magnet
Powers: Average (0) Lightning Blast, Average (0) Super-Intellect
Motivation: To decode secrets. Which are then for sale.

* * *

This poem takes place on Tuesday, July 15 when Mallory is 27 weeks pregnant.

Coping skills can be positive or negative. It helps to keep a list of things that make you happy.

S'mores are tasty treats customarily made over a campfire. Cracker Barrel makes a kitchen version similar to this.

Cracker Barrel has been criticized for discrimination in the past, although it has since improved its policies.

Socket = Craftswoman1438
"For a homeowner set, a sub-$100 Craftsman or Gearwrench set with 1/4″ and 3/8″ sockets should suffice."

A Truce Zone is a temporary or permanent place where warring parties agree not to fight, or people generally agree that fighting should not be done.

(no subject)

Date: 2017-09-19 04:07 am (UTC)
From: [personal profile] chanter_greenie
*grins* S'mores of any variety are a darn good reason not to hurl the planet into the sun.

You've got a stray 25 line number in there, heads up.

(no subject)

Date: 2017-09-19 05:10 am (UTC)
technoshaman: Tux (Default)
From: [personal profile] technoshaman
Any variety? Smores Challah? :D

And Mals is TOTES ADORBS. Yet another one suborned to, if not Lawful Good, at least Chaotic Good... ;)

Re: Thoughts

Date: 2017-09-19 05:33 am (UTC)
technoshaman: Tux (Default)
From: [personal profile] technoshaman
*drool, slobber*

You are *welcome*, milady! *passes napkins*

(my work here is done! for now... ;)

Some superheroes ARE unrealistic idealists. Superman chief among'em! The one - *one* - Supes strip I like, he goes OOC. (Send it to you back channel, touchy subject) Green Lantern is the same way. Biggest fight *between* superheroes I ever saw was after the resurrection of Oliver Queen... Ollie!Arrow is somewhere to the left of Kshama Sawant, and GL (I can't pin WHICH GL for sure, Kyle I think) is somewhere to the right of Supes... Kevin Smith was writing both books for the crossover, and he wrote it to the nines. Best fight-love-fight seen EVAR. I think Ollie was *right* in the fight, but *both of'em* were being ... unreasonable. Smith talks good story but I wouldn't want to *live* with his characters... or, frankly, given how much shit both GA and GL get drug through, anywhere near the blast radii of their adversaries. *wry*

Cartoon physics, eh?

(no subject)

Date: 2017-09-19 05:17 am (UTC)
bairnsidhe: (Default)
From: [personal profile] bairnsidhe
Yum, yep, that's a good reason not to hurl the planet into the sun. I love all the ladies getting a chance to talk food and plan positive re-enforcement for good food. Seems like sooner or later people will notice and make the tasties in an attempt to get on the No-Hit List, lol.

Also, I love that BlackSheep has a No-Hit List. They're very organized villains.

(no subject)

Date: 2017-09-19 05:35 am (UTC)
technoshaman: Tux (Default)
From: [personal profile] technoshaman
Yeah, I'd hang with'em.

Kinda like that cat Gabe what come down on Sattidy nights to Hell's own Jazz Club and blow de HORN... ;)

(See, now, *there's* a superhero, as it were, who knows how to let his hair down!!!)

(no subject)

Date: 2017-09-21 10:11 pm (UTC)
thnidu: warm red heart on orange streaked background (heart)
From: [personal profile] thnidu
I LOVE this!

Re: Yes...

Date: 2017-09-21 10:30 pm (UTC)
technoshaman: Tux (Default)
From: [personal profile] technoshaman
Lessee... I know a drummer, and a wee pixie whose cello could double for a slap bass... a Delta blueswoman with a guitar named Stella (STELLA!!!!) .... both original singers are available FSVO available, but I'm also wondering if you wouldn't transpose it down for a sultry alto... Question is, where could I find a trumpet player? Because this wants a SOLO... Actually? This wants a big extended JAZZ BREAK, to do it right. Everybody gets a turn, trumpet goes last, and cracks the rafters.

Re: Yes...

Date: 2017-09-21 10:54 pm (UTC)
technoshaman: Tux (Default)
From: [personal profile] technoshaman
I know a jazz keys player - she's got a PhD, a Pegasus, and ... HEY! I'm bein' a doofus. Play It With Moxie is filk's own house jazz band, and she's the keys player for them. You'd still want to add an axe (they don't have one that I know of).... but I'm pretty sure they've got a 'bone player, and two sexophones... come to think of it, they've got that alto (she's Canadienne, eh?)... if you hit the bandcamp link off that site you can hear'em. Filk torch jazz. :D

(no subject)

Date: 2017-09-22 04:39 am (UTC)
thnidu: my familiar. "Beanie Baby" -type dragon, red with white wings (Default)
From: [personal profile] thnidu
Thanks. I love Cat's songs.

(no subject)

Date: 2017-09-22 04:56 am (UTC)
technoshaman: Tux (Default)
From: [personal profile] technoshaman
Do you do OVFF?

(no subject)

Date: 2017-10-05 08:45 pm (UTC)
thnidu: my familiar. "Beanie Baby" -type dragon, red with white wings (Default)
From: [personal profile] thnidu
No, too far. I do only East Coast... and fewer of those now that I'm carless (sob!)

(no subject)

Date: 2017-10-05 09:22 pm (UTC)
technoshaman: Tux (Default)
From: [personal profile] technoshaman
Yeah, the real downside of OVFF being in Columbus is that there's jack all for train service.... and a number of people whose either psyches or pocketbooks are allergic to flying...


ysabetwordsmith: Cartoon of me in Wordsmith persona (Default)

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