>> Yeah- at some point, the bed really just isn't big enough for everyone, or so I've heard! xD <<
This has not stopped some people from custom-building their own beds. There are a few companies that make giant beds, but some families just put several mattresses together.
>> I think it's worth noting that there's a distinction between sexual attraction, and libido, which the definition doesn't really get into, either <<
Exactly! To me, desire is about wanting and asexuality is not wanting to have sex. An ace person might still feel lust sometimes, but without the compulsion to act on it that a sexual person has, or even a distaste for doing so.
>> I don't experience attraction in that particular form, but once in a blue moon, my body chemistry starts making itself known in Inconvenient fashions.<<
That's exactly what happens to Shiv. Once in a while, his dick is determined to do things that the rest of him doesn't want to do. :/
>> And that's *exactly* what the community as a whole is leaning towards, these days.<<
\o/
>> (It also leads to constant back-and-forth about whether celibates count as ace, when that's usually seen as a vocational leaning, and whether certain celibate characters count, but these are usually treated as thought exercises.) <<
Did they stop to ask whether someone under a vow of celibacy wants to have sex? Because that's traditionally where acefolk went to avoid forced marriage.
Anyhow, there are different kinds of celibacy, just as there are of asexuality. For some people it is very difficult, they constantly want sex but deny themselves. That's not asexuality. But for others, celibacy is an important part of their identity and not a hardship. They're much closer related.
>>She's *incredibly* valid. Possibly not the healthiest method of dealing things, but you know what, whatever floats her boat!<<
It occurs to me that another ace person validating Shiv and Fortress would make for fascinating prompts.
I know that the Finns are encouraging Shiv in that regard, because whatever his exact details, flagging as ace prevents awkwardness by letting people know he is Not Looking. There's a scene I'd love to do where Heron offers Shiv an outgrown top in ace flag colors.
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dancing_serpent
Re: *sympathy wince*
Date: 2020-04-21 06:24 pm (UTC)This has not stopped some people from custom-building their own beds. There are a few companies that make giant beds, but some families just put several mattresses together.
>> I think it's worth noting that there's a distinction between sexual attraction, and libido, which the definition doesn't really get into, either <<
Exactly! To me, desire is about wanting and asexuality is not wanting to have sex. An ace person might still feel lust sometimes, but without the compulsion to act on it that a sexual person has, or even a distaste for doing so.
>> I don't experience attraction in that particular form, but once in a blue moon, my body chemistry starts making itself known in Inconvenient fashions.<<
That's exactly what happens to Shiv. Once in a while, his dick is determined to do things that the rest of him doesn't want to do. :/
>> And that's *exactly* what the community as a whole is leaning towards, these days.<<
\o/
>> (It also leads to constant back-and-forth about whether celibates count as ace, when that's usually seen as a vocational leaning, and whether certain celibate characters count, but these are usually treated as thought exercises.) <<
Did they stop to ask whether someone under a vow of celibacy wants to have sex? Because that's traditionally where acefolk went to avoid forced marriage.
Anyhow, there are different kinds of celibacy, just as there are of asexuality. For some people it is very difficult, they constantly want sex but deny themselves. That's not asexuality. But for others, celibacy is an important part of their identity and not a hardship. They're much closer related.
>>She's *incredibly* valid. Possibly not the healthiest method of dealing things, but you know what, whatever floats her boat!<<
It occurs to me that another ace person validating Shiv and Fortress would make for fascinating prompts.
I know that the Finns are encouraging Shiv in that regard, because whatever his exact details, flagging as ace prevents awkwardness by letting people know he is Not Looking. There's a scene I'd love to do where Heron offers Shiv an outgrown top in ace flag colors.