>> There's a really common bit of tripe running around the 'Net: racism is TAUGHT, along with some cute picture of little kids of different skin tones. <<
Xenophobia is a widespread innate tendency in humans. Not all have it, but many do. The details are taught, particularly in terms of preferred ranking and which traits are considered Bad.
>> The implication is "You've been taught to BE this way, SHAME!" rather than an acknowledgment that while it was taught, UNLEARNING also takes time. Being UNTAUGHT bad ideas about science takes time. <<
That's true.
>> So people who TRY to unlearn something negative deserve credit for even making the EFFORT, early on, or they'll see the other group as /demanding/ perfection, perfect compliance... thought control. Because unless you /allow/ for mistakes, it is. <<
In my experience, what works best is to praise whatever they're doing right -- even if it's just wanting to change -- and then offering ideas on how they could do better. Ask them about their goals. Ask them what they see as shortcomings they want to fix. Ask what resources they have to use for that. Then support their efforts.
Look how much work Pat has poured into Chris. When they met, Chris was just a good ol' boy who was decent enough he didn't want to see a man killed in cold blood, even if that man happened to be black. Now he's good friends with the whole mixed team, and actively working to teach tolerance. His family background will always be there, but it no longer defines his world.
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dancing_serpent
Re: Another great use
Date: 2014-12-19 08:36 am (UTC)Xenophobia is a widespread innate tendency in humans. Not all have it, but many do. The details are taught, particularly in terms of preferred ranking and which traits are considered Bad.
>> The implication is "You've been taught to BE this way, SHAME!" rather than an acknowledgment that while it was taught, UNLEARNING also takes time. Being UNTAUGHT bad ideas about science takes time. <<
That's true.
>> So people who TRY to unlearn something negative deserve credit for even making the EFFORT, early on, or they'll see the other group as /demanding/ perfection, perfect compliance... thought control. Because unless you /allow/ for mistakes, it is. <<
In my experience, what works best is to praise whatever they're doing right -- even if it's just wanting to change -- and then offering ideas on how they could do better. Ask them about their goals. Ask them what they see as shortcomings they want to fix. Ask what resources they have to use for that. Then support their efforts.
Look how much work Pat has poured into Chris. When they met, Chris was just a good ol' boy who was decent enough he didn't want to see a man killed in cold blood, even if that man happened to be black. Now he's good friends with the whole mixed team, and actively working to teach tolerance. His family background will always be there, but it no longer defines his world.
Racism hurts everyone, just not in the same ways.