Poem: "Kitchen Courtesies"
Mar. 5th, 2013 11:02 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
ysabetwordsmithThanks to new prompters Rosieknight and Polydad, you get a second freebie today. This poem was inspired by a prompt from technoshaman and is a crossover between Schrodinger's Heroes and BBC Sherlock.
"Kitchen Courtesies"
It's funny how fast
John and Sherlock settle in
to life in the Teflon Tesseract.
John cringes the first time
Pat finds eyeballs in the refrigerator,
but instead of screaming,
Pat calmly collars Sherlock and says,
"Experiments go in the lab fridge,
not in the kitchen fridge.
Also, remember that you live
with other scientists now
and you need to label your things
so you don't contaminate each other's data."
Or anyone's diet, John adds silently,
but he is impressed that there are no hysterics.
The second time, it's Bailey,
and it's Sherlock using the good cleaver
to cut chunks of some kind of hose.
Bailey drags him to the workshop and says,
"Only cut food in the kitchen or the cooks complain.
Out here you can cut anything the tools will cut.
Bonus points if you can figure out how
to cut through anything from the 'uncuttable' collection."
Sherlock has yet to succeed at the latter,
but John has confidence in his gigantic brain.
The first time John trips over thin air
and nearly bashes his face
against the kitchen counter,
Sherlock throws a tantrum.
The second time,
Sherlock rolls his silver eyes
at the abashed tentacle monster
and says, "Tim. Please.
You are an intergalactic quantum physicist.
Do try to remember to shut the drawers
on the hyperspace pantry."
It's all very domestic in a mad-hatter sort of way,
and John thinks that, yes, he could get used to this.
technoshaman and is a crossover between Schrodinger's Heroes and BBC Sherlock."Kitchen Courtesies"
It's funny how fast
John and Sherlock settle in
to life in the Teflon Tesseract.
John cringes the first time
Pat finds eyeballs in the refrigerator,
but instead of screaming,
Pat calmly collars Sherlock and says,
"Experiments go in the lab fridge,
not in the kitchen fridge.
Also, remember that you live
with other scientists now
and you need to label your things
so you don't contaminate each other's data."
Or anyone's diet, John adds silently,
but he is impressed that there are no hysterics.
The second time, it's Bailey,
and it's Sherlock using the good cleaver
to cut chunks of some kind of hose.
Bailey drags him to the workshop and says,
"Only cut food in the kitchen or the cooks complain.
Out here you can cut anything the tools will cut.
Bonus points if you can figure out how
to cut through anything from the 'uncuttable' collection."
Sherlock has yet to succeed at the latter,
but John has confidence in his gigantic brain.
The first time John trips over thin air
and nearly bashes his face
against the kitchen counter,
Sherlock throws a tantrum.
The second time,
Sherlock rolls his silver eyes
at the abashed tentacle monster
and says, "Tim. Please.
You are an intergalactic quantum physicist.
Do try to remember to shut the drawers
on the hyperspace pantry."
It's all very domestic in a mad-hatter sort of way,
and John thinks that, yes, he could get used to this.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
(no subject)
Date: 2013-03-06 05:23 am (UTC)It's been five minutes and I'm *still* giggling.
Wait. How DID Sherlock get to know Tim that well? (Yes, I'm fishing for more poetry :)
Yay!
Date: 2013-03-09 08:50 am (UTC)And of course, Sherlock learned about Tim by observation. Tim is complex; it takes a while.
(no subject)
Date: 2013-03-06 06:43 am (UTC)http://www.goodreads.com/group/show/233-poetry?utm_campaign=2013-03&utm_content=poetry&utm_medium=email&utm_source=newsletter
I don't know the details but wanted to let you and Wyld_Dandelyon know.
(no subject)
Date: 2013-03-06 12:17 pm (UTC)Yay!
Date: 2013-03-06 07:02 pm (UTC)I figured that Sherlock spent so much time alone, he just never learned a lot of the accommodations for having other people around. If he's the only one eating out of the fridge, the only risk is food contamination. But as soon as you've got more than one person moving weird stuff around, divided workspace and labeling become a great deal more important so you don't mess up each other's work. That's fairly new to Sherlock.
Re: Yay!
Date: 2013-03-07 05:39 am (UTC)Re: Yay!
Date: 2013-03-07 05:41 am (UTC)Re: Yay!
Date: 2013-03-07 05:49 am (UTC)Re: Yay!
Date: 2013-03-07 05:50 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2013-03-06 06:55 am (UTC)Yay!
Date: 2013-03-06 07:07 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2013-03-06 04:28 pm (UTC)Yay!
Date: 2013-03-06 07:25 pm (UTC)I've seen so many different versions of Sherlock, and I love most of them.
(no subject)
Date: 2013-03-07 06:00 pm (UTC)Thank you!
Date: 2013-03-07 08:01 pm (UTC)Hyperspace pantry
Date: 2014-04-07 07:19 pm (UTC)Pleeeeaaaase?
And... can I have a hyperspace bookcase or two to go with it?
-Seriously, though, fabulous, hilarious, and vivid! Thank you.
Re: Hyperspace pantry
Date: 2014-04-07 07:50 pm (UTC)Pleeeeaaaase?
And... can I have a hyperspace bookcase or two to go with it? <<
You and me both.
I can make things bigger on the inside than on the outside, but there are limits. I broke a closet once trying to double its capacity. Got everything IN there all right, but a few hours later the containment ruptured, tore the hangar bar loose from its solid wood mooring, and spewed clothes all over the floor.
>> -Seriously, though, fabulous, hilarious, and vivid! Thank you. <<
Yay! I'm happy to hear that.
Re: Hyperspace pantry
Date: 2021-01-10 03:58 am (UTC)Is there anyone who doesn't daydream of "MORE SHELF SPACE", though? Scamander boxes and bags of holding make me sigh "If only..."
DPD
Oh, p.s., "Not your housekeeper" just went through my mind, and I wondered about the state of other rooms — ?? I haven't read much of the non-crossover stuff, so maybe it's answered early on?
Re: Hyperspace pantry
Date: 2021-01-10 05:13 am (UTC)Yay!
>> Is there anyone who doesn't daydream of "MORE SHELF SPACE", though? Scamander boxes and bags of holding make me sigh "If only..." <<
Nobody in my circle of friends. I have a knack for dimensional expansion and I broke even that once.
>> Oh, p.s., "Not your housekeeper" just went through my mind, and I wondered about the state of other rooms — ?? I haven't read much of the non-crossover stuff, so maybe it's answered early on? <<
This is pretty much the snapshot that shows how they work out different expectations. People's personal space is largely up to them how they want to maintain it. Shared spaces each evolve their own parameters, but the Tef is huge so there is room for everything anyone could possibly want to do.
(no subject)
Date: 2014-06-06 01:07 am (UTC)Thank you!
Date: 2014-06-06 04:00 am (UTC)