>> Ah, but there are different kinds of being a jerk. <<
That's true, and they are important distinctions.
>> The "My wants are more important than your needs" kind are at best really annoying... and past childhood can be anooying to dangerous. <<
Yyyyeah. That's the kind Ti-Jean winds up cleaning up after frequently. 0_o Another is the thoughtless kind who make stupid mistakes with people and other things, like opening the sealed evil in a can -- the "poor impulse control" type.
>> People with emotional damage... depends on the specific extent of damage, and if or how they're trying to compensate it so as not to hurt anyone.<<
That certainly applies to Ti-Jean. His family drama was always a bit of an issue, but got much worse after most of his friends died in a magical incident. Ti-Jean tries to be a decent person, but he has come through so much crap -- and missed important experiences as a result -- that it's hard for him. He's always moving around, so a lack of roots and ties is not helping that. Add in his crisis-to-crisis lifestyle and a frequent need to get things done quickly to prevent worse problems, when people around him rarely understand and sometimes get in the way. Now consider that he often gets banged up while fixing things, and he copes with that by using substances. You can see how this can make him a bit brusque and prickly.
>> Someone who lacks social skills and is willing to learn is usually okay...if you know they are lacking skills and are willing to learn. <<
Yeah. At this age, Cas is too little to make fine distinctions like that. He can, however, distinguish between sheer meanness and social clumsiness. That's enough for going on with.
>> So here we have an emotionally damaged grump, who is not lashing out aggressively, and who also has strong protector / provider impulses. So if the grumpiness and trauma (and bad luck jinx) aren't flat-out dealbreakers, he does have a ton of good qualities. <<
Very well reasoned. Ti-Jean certainly has the heroic trait of throwing himself in front of a bus to protect other people. The damaged part is that he has almost no personal regard or self-preservation. He tends to feel that he deserves bad things happening to him.
Re: Yay!
That's true, and they are important distinctions.
>> The "My wants are more important than your needs" kind are at best really annoying... and past childhood can be anooying to dangerous. <<
Yyyyeah. That's the kind Ti-Jean winds up cleaning up after frequently. 0_o Another is the thoughtless kind who make stupid mistakes with people and other things, like opening the sealed evil in a can -- the "poor impulse control" type.
>> People with emotional damage... depends on the specific extent of damage, and if or how they're trying to compensate it so as not to hurt anyone.<<
That certainly applies to Ti-Jean. His family drama was always a bit of an issue, but got much worse after most of his friends died in a magical incident. Ti-Jean tries to be a decent person, but he has come through so much crap -- and missed important experiences as a result -- that it's hard for him. He's always moving around, so a lack of roots and ties is not helping that. Add in his crisis-to-crisis lifestyle and a frequent need to get things done quickly to prevent worse problems, when people around him rarely understand and sometimes get in the way. Now consider that he often gets banged up while fixing things, and he copes with that by using substances. You can see how this can make him a bit brusque and prickly.
>> Someone who lacks social skills and is willing to learn is usually okay...if you know they are lacking skills and are willing to learn. <<
Yeah. At this age, Cas is too little to make fine distinctions like that. He can, however, distinguish between sheer meanness and social clumsiness. That's enough for going on with.
>> So here we have an emotionally damaged grump, who is not lashing out aggressively, and who also has strong protector / provider impulses. So if the grumpiness and trauma (and bad luck jinx) aren't flat-out dealbreakers, he does have a ton of good qualities. <<
Very well reasoned. Ti-Jean certainly has the heroic trait of throwing himself in front of a bus to protect other people. The damaged part is that he has almost no personal regard or self-preservation. He tends to feel that he deserves bad things happening to him.