>> In my case "I gave up on trying to fix this six months back, you try thinking of solutions. And then I'll refuse any I've already tried, / don't think will work." <<
That is a logical way to avoid wasting energy.
It also makes people claim that you "don't want help," despite the fact that help is not actually available.
>>Then you get people who think such a system is already in place, so, say racial prison disparities or the gender wage gap are because of individuals making bad choices (their argument not mine), not a slightly biased system with cumulative effects.<<
I will say, if you're trying to adjust someone else's deep-seated beliefs, those are load-bearing walls more often than not. A person with flexible beliefs will be able to cite examples and evidence in support of theirs, and to argue rationally about your examples and evidence; this suggests that sufficient evidence could change their mind, so it's not attached such that changes would routinely be destructive. A person with inflexible beliefs is prone to collapse if those beliefs are disrupted. Therefore, in dealing with less-flexible people, you need to consider whether it is justified to smash their reality tunnel. If someone is attacking me or mine, I will not hesitate to do damage that modern medicine is not well equipped to repair. But for a trivial offense, that would be excessive force.
Re: Well ...
That is a logical way to avoid wasting energy.
It also makes people claim that you "don't want help," despite the fact that help is not actually available.
>>Then you get people who think such a system is already in place, so, say racial prison disparities or the gender wage gap are because of individuals making bad choices (their argument not mine), not a slightly biased system with cumulative effects.<<
That probably looks a lot like the disparity in perception vs. reality of economic inequality.
I will say, if you're trying to adjust someone else's deep-seated beliefs, those are load-bearing walls more often than not. A person with flexible beliefs will be able to cite examples and evidence in support of theirs, and to argue rationally about your examples and evidence; this suggests that sufficient evidence could change their mind, so it's not attached such that changes would routinely be destructive. A person with inflexible beliefs is prone to collapse if those beliefs are disrupted. Therefore, in dealing with less-flexible people, you need to consider whether it is justified to smash their reality tunnel. If someone is attacking me or mine, I will not hesitate to do damage that modern medicine is not well equipped to repair. But for a trivial offense, that would be excessive force.