One of the major things that Graham is offering when Shiv is in a panic is just naming Shiv's feelings, and asking for confirmation that he's "guessed" correctly. That doesn't just teach Shiv WORDS for the situation at hand, it gives Shiv CONTROL over the pace. They'd stop and re-frame until Graham gets it right, which gives Shiv a LOT more time as well.

I'd say that Shiv's emotional-panic responses are closer to a preschooler than a toddler now, which is a HUGE amount of progress.